It's a Golden Life

She was.

2012-02-11T22:17:00.004-06:00

It's been a very difficult few weeks for our family. It's actually been difficult for a while now-we just didn't know how much more it would be. I have been struggling to make sense out of what is. My Nanny, whom I love so so dearly, is dying of cancer. Those last four words are so harsh. I've gone through many stages of grief in the past couple weeks since learning about her fast declining health. See, she was receiving treatments and progressing well. She was feeling better and had more energy. There were days with ups and downs, but for the most part, she was getting better.

I talked to her Friday, January 27. She was on her way from an appointment. We made small talk about my kids and how she was feeling. Little did I know that this would be the last time I would talk to her while she was coherent. If only I knew that was the last time I talked to her, I would've talked longer, said more-dwelled with her for just a little longer. But we never know.

She was taken to the hospital on Sunday because of excruciating pain. She had pain in her head and the doctors did not understand why. They ran tests, but concluded that her body was shutting down from the cancer. Just like that.

I've never lost someone so close to me. I had a relationship with her much like the one I have with my mother. I talked with her on the phone almost daily. I didn't realize how woven she is into my life. She has never even visited me here in Arkansas, but she is everywhere in my house. She is in my children's books, toys and clothes. She is in my attic with the huge box of fabric she gave me when I graduated college. She is in my filing cabinet-her loving words written in many cards for birthdays, Christmas and even Easter. She is everywhere. Lately, everything I see reminds me of her somehow.

I had a very difficult time dealing with the grief of losing her. Even as I type those words-it doesn't seem real. In my mind, she is just very sick and will be better eventually. But eventually is never and I have come to terms with that. I am embracing who she was in my life and hoping she knew it. Her love was one of the best things that happened to me in my life and I am just so thankful I was able to be blanketed in it for so long. Twenty five years is a long time. I have so many funny, exciting, loving memories that cloud my mind. I am blessed to share this legacy of my Nanny-Joyce Jean Heckart. She was amazing. I will always love her so much. The hurt is so so deep right now and fresh. I know with time, it will dull a little and I will learn to just carry on with life. There will be a huge gaping hole in my life where I can't see or talk to her anymore here-but I have hope in the future that I will see her again. She won't be in pain. She'll be just as loving and sarcastic, but free from the constraints of her body that was here on earth.

I will get used to a disconnected phone number-where she was always on speed dial-but leave her name on there just a little while longer. I'll keep replaying the loving voicemails she has left me-calling me by my nicknames and telling me how much she loved me. I'll read her birthday card she sent me for my birthday last month-even though she was so worried I would be offended it was a week late because she had been in the hospital that week. I will cherish the emails she took the time to write to me-even when I was a teenager and was selfish, she still told me how much she loved me and how proud of me she was. The hurt is deep. Real deep. But my Jesus can fill that void of pain. It's just going to take some time.

If you love someone...

2012-01-31T13:05:00.003-06:00

I am having a very tough day. My head is pounding. My heart is breaking. I keep thinking about the last time I visited my Nanny. She still lived in Maryland, in the same house since I was born. Married to the same good ol' guy-Charlie-who is an awesome grandpa. The last time I got to visit with her was over two years ago.

My childhood family gatherings on my mothers side were always at my Nanny & Charlie's house. I remember only a few occasions where we got together at one of my Aunts to BBQ and swim. Superbowl parties (go Cowboys-because the Ravens were around until 2000), Holiday gatherings, cookouts and just plain old hang out BBQ's. I have so many lovely memories of my family all together just celebrating love, friendship, and, of course, horseshoes & food. I still have the smell of their house locked into my memory.

I sometimes catch a whiff of that certain scent and my mind is taken back to the blue and white chairs in my Nanny's kitchen. The tv in the corner with soap operas, the news or wheel of fortune playing. The candy jar with Reeses' peanut butter cups. The red Kitchen Aid mixture on the counter. My certain bag of Milano cookies-just waiting for me to devour them. The living room that had white carpet and beautiful blue couches. They always had a different scene in their front window for Christmas time. Their house was not big at all, but in my mind-it was huge. I'm not sure how many times I went there in my 13 years (almost 14) living there, but my mind is flooded with mostly memories from being there. With my sister in their "angel bedroom" playing cards late into the night. In the basement, hiding behind the sectional where we put lots of blankets for a fort. Swinging and climbing trees in the backyard. Visiting the neighbors and riding up and down the street on tricycles and bicycles. Hanging out with my 13 cousins. Aunts and Uncles. Friends.

My childhood holds sweet, sweet memories of my Nanny's house. This is mostly because of who my Nanny and Charlie are. They are kind & loving-and it overflowed into their home and into my life. Shopping trips, jamming out to the "Cocomo song", smelling her perfume, going out to lunch. I am so thankful for them being in my life. I would not be who I am without them.

If I knew that a little over two years ago would possibly be the last time I was able to spend with them-I would've lingered a little longer. Like the scent of my Nanny's perfume that is always on my mind. I would've cherished every single second. I would've taken the exit one last time on the way out of town. I am so thankful that I have these memories of her. And so heartbroken that distance and money keep people who love each other dearly from seeing each other and being there when one is in need.

If you love someone...always make sure they know how much. Like-really-just how much. Because you never know when the last time you'll be able to spend with them. Savor those times with ones that are precious to you-even if you think- "There's always tomorrow" --because sometimes--there just isn't.

Sometimes it takes a reminder to savor moments

2012-01-25T14:03:00.004-06:00

Life is busy. Sometimes it just feels like I am "getting through" the day. I have little time to myself and hardly manage to take a shower. In fact, I woke up Donovan this morning when (for the third day in a row) Paxton woke up before my alarm and wouldn't go back to sleep just so I could hop in the shower.

The kids usually wake up at 7:15...no matter if they went to bed at 8 or 11 and want food, drinks, comfort, cartoons. Immediately "mommy mode" takes over and I begin changing pullups, dressing kids for the day, making cereal....now they want oatmeal, someone wants chocolate milk, someone wants juice, and the fit that comes from the fact that we are all out of strawberries....deal with the fit, (try not to) get frustrated. I haven't had time to take a shower, change out of my pajamas, eat breakfast...let alone brush my teeth.

But this strong mommy desire over takes my mind and I want my kids to be comfortable...and quiet :)

I've been in a slump for a couple weeks. It probably has to do with the fact that I am a little overtired from being woken up 3 times a night. Or that I want to spend time with Donovan, so I may occasionally (okay..frequently) stay up too late catching up on tv shows. I've hardly managed to shower and change into clothes other than clean yoga pants and a t-shirt (what most would accept as fancy pajamas). Or maybe it's those high energy kiddos that rarely get to go outside because it's sprinter (spring and winter...sometimes it's 65, then it's 19) and burn off some energy. Or possibly because of the fact that I am OCD about keeping my house clean....and that is near impossible with so many kids, so I am go go going. :) I constantly day dream about working out and getting back into shape.

I've slacked a TON with keeping up with reading the Bible and praying lately. It seems like I am going ALL day and am exhausted at night. Donovan keeps encouraging me to go through Prof. Horner's Bible reading plan on my Iphone app. You read 10 chapters a day and it keeps track of everything for you-where you left off, what to read next...etc. Due to being so tired and busy all day, I've managed to push aside my relationship with Christ and feel so convicted.

I've also slacked on my attitude. I've been SO negative. I have had such a bad attitude about things in general. A cup half empty sort of demeanor. Ya know-the kind you don't want to hang around. I haven't been very fun :) This afternoon while the kids were laying down for their naps, I was catching up on some blogging-I was reminded how this time in my life is only a season. Paxton was our last newborn baby and we won't be doing the 3 am feedings anymore. In fact, he's already past that point. Halynd will never be 21 pounds again. I don't need to puree Malachi's carrots anymore-he eats them whole with ranch. If my kids are hungry or thirsty-they open the refrigerator and bring me what they want. I look forward to the first time Malachi tries to make his own bowl of cereal or when Halynd tries to cut her hair while she cooks bacon (not that I ever did THAT) or when Paxton starts eating at the table with us. Even when the three of my kids start playing together.

The blog I mentioned is about a mother of two who lost her sweet baby girl when she was only two days old. I can't imagine the heartbreak. I was reminded that this "stuff" God has blessed me with-my family- is what it's all about. It's all about being thankful for my family and living in opportunities to spend time with each other and teaching them to honor God. Be it pouring juice in a sippy cup, doing laundry or cooking dinner- I have a ton to be thankful for. I have a lot to look forward to. Sometimes it just takes a reminder not to just "get through the day" but to savor the precious moments of life.

Two months!

2012-01-23T13:25:00.003-06:00

I cannot believe how fast these past 2 months have flown by. I think the holidays come and go and it makes time seem to move a lot faster.

Paxton had his 2 month check up on Friday. He is doing very well!
Weight: 13 lb 4 oz.
Height: 22.5 inches
Head: 40 cm (15 inches)
Clothes: 0-3 month and some 3-6 month
Food: eating about 4 oz every 3 hours (sometimes 2.5)

Some things I want to remember about him at 2 months:

He sleeps for about 6 straight hours at night. He started sleeping from 10-4 at about 7 weeks. He wakes up to eat at 4 and then goes back down for 2.5-3 more hours.
He is loving bath time. I lowered his bottom part of the sling so that his body and legs are almost covered in water. He loves the water to be pretty warm-almost hot.
He started talking to us. His most talkative times are in the morning after sleeping all night.
He loves to stand with us holding him under his arm pits.
He has great neck control but doesn't want anything to do with tummy time. We introduced the Bumbo this week.
He likes to sit in his bouncy seat and watch the kids play or the dog walk by. He just noticed Bug this morning and his eyes lit up. He started "talking" to Bug and waving his arms :)
He is still liking the swing. Although it is starting to squeak when he is swinging in it :) I'm not sure if it's because of how much he weighs or if the swing has just had it. It's been through 4 years of baby.
He likes sleeping on his stomach. I was extremely paranoid at first (and still kind of am), so every little noise he made at night woke me up.
He is a thumb sucker. I am sure he likes sleeping on his belly because he has better access to his thumbs. I have tried every binky possible, but he just isn't having it.
He learned to smile at about 6 weeks and loves engaging your eyes to flash a nice big smile.

Paxton,

I cannot believe you are already two months old! You have been since birth and still are such a sweet baby boy. I am not exaggerating when I say you are the sweetest baby I've ever met. I would do anything to work for a little smile from you. Your blue eyes light up when you talk to us and we just love to listen. I am excited to watch you grow and learn. You've already grown so much. Love you sweet boy!

Mommy

Mary's Labor

2011-12-24T22:29:00.002-06:00

I know that the actual day of Christmas is not really Jesus' birthday...but it is when we celebrate. I cannot help to think about how Mary and Joseph were feeling at this point. Mary, undoubtedly very uncomfortable in her pregnancy, knew who she was about to labor into this world. Joseph was probably so excited, but nervous. I mean, he was going to be the earthly father to the King of all Kings, Creator of the universe...seems a little intimidating! Mary's labor was not miraculously pain free. She couldn't rely on the medical technology we have now. She endured labor to birth Jesus. And into a barn. Where there are animals roaming. I'll bet it probably smelled, was cold and rather uncomfortable. We're not talking Mercy Hospital-all the cranberry juice you could ever desire. Delicious meals. Someone to change her soiled cloths.

The Savior of the world was born as a helpless little baby. He relied on Mary and Joseph to feed him. To keep him clean. To love him and nurture him. To teach him important skills in life-walking, talking.

I want to remember this point with Paxton. He requires a huge amount of care. He cannot care for himself! And who am I to be his mother? He would wallow in hunger, dirty diapers and loneliness if we did not take care of him. He does not talk or feed himself. We only know he is hungry when he cries and tries to eat his own hand. We know he is dirty when he is smelly, so we change him. We comfort him when his belly is upset. I cannot even begin to know what was on Mary's mind while she was caring for Jesus as a little, helpless baby. Obviously, she needed no more proof than the virgin birth of Jesus to convince her that he was the Son of God. She cared for Jesus as his mother. She carried him in her womb. What a responsibility to care for God as a little baby boy. I want to remember what it feels like to care for my babies.

I want to remember that Jesus was born.. Sometimes I get so caught up in the fact that He died and was resurrected, but that birth part gets pushed aside! His birth was SO important in how He was born to a poor, unmarried, virgin girl.

Even though it's not "the real day" of Jesus' birth, I want to remember and celebrate that the Son of God put skin on and became a helpless little baby to be cared for by one of us.

Mommy needs a time out

2011-12-19T15:17:00.003-06:00

There's laundry to be washed, folded and put away. There are dishes to be washed and put away. There are rooms to keep cleaned. There are floors to keep swept and mopped. Carpets to vaccum. BUT my kids are not going to always be so little. I am realizing more and more that there are always going to be THINGS to do. All day. Every day. However, the time I am priviledged to stay at home with my little ones is limited.

I often find myself getting caught up in the nonsense of everyday toddler hood as well. Raising kids is hard work. Anyone who says it is easy....needs to let me in on their secret! As I am typing this-I have a newborn on my chest asleep, a 4 year old begging for more chocolate milk and to go to the park and a 2 year old trying to shove a binky into said newborns sleeping locked gums. Lately, if I have a thought and don't write it down...I forget. I can only imagine why! :)

I get caught up in the frustrations too. Of children not listening. Of cleaning up toys and nonsense all day long. I am frustrated when they throw fits (especially in public places). I am frustrated when they get into things. I am frustrated when they break things. I am frustrated when they respond differently than I expect them to. What I often find myself forgetting is that this is only a season of our life. A short, sweet season that I take for granted far too often. Amisdt the the screaming & messes demanding my attention with every waking hour, because-let's face it-my children do not know how to sleep, there is a certain sweetness.

18 years is not an eternity. It is a fraction of a grain of sand in time. I've already wasted 4 years of motherhood being frustrated. It's time to delight in my children and find God's joy in them. Not like I have in the past where it's been temporary joy. I want to give my frustrations to God and not over react in situations. I don't want my sweet children to remember me as an overbearing, over reactive mom who was no fun and was always uptight about EVERY.THING.

So, if you read this-Please pray for me to seek God. Specifically in these frustrating parenting situations. I want to make Jesus famous with everything I am. My children are a part of me.

Not traditional

2011-12-09T13:53:00.004-06:00

I had an idea. I was positive my hubby would not go along with it. I still shared it with him, making sure to tell him he couldn't speak until I was completely finished sharing my idea. We have a (in my opinion) huge master bedroom and bath. The kids each had their own rooms. My idea: switch it up a little! The kids are at a young age where they can still share a room without the need for much privacy. I am also at a point where I want to "purge" all the unnecessary stuff we are hoarding.

So! I proposed that we put Halynd, Malachi and (eventually) Paxton in our master bedroom, us move into Malachi's bedroom and have an office in Halynd's room. In my mind, this is genius! We have two ginormous closets in our bathroom as well as a gigantic linen closet. By putting the toys in one closet, the kids will have specific places to put toys and hang up all their dress up clothes. The other closet will be used to house all their clothes. I can put Malachi's clothes on the bottom rack so he can dress himself! He's always asking me to reach something and if I don't respond quick enough....he climbs on his toy shelf (knocking everything down) and breaks hangers.

We are also going to have a reading area and put book shelves on the walls. I'm very excited about this! We'll have a little table and a couple chairs and (Halynd's Christmas present from us) an Art easel.

Bed time will be so much simpler, too! The kids prefer Donovan to put them to bed, after not seeing him all day while he's working. And I have to usually take care of Paxton around this time (inevitably) so, he'll be able to sit in one room with both of them!

They will have a nice big bathroom decorated in jungle animals and ours will become a more "adult" theme of the beach :)

I realize this is not a "traditional" thing to do...but it's what will work best for us! Donovan immediately liked the idea! I was surprised, but excited and surely ready for a change. We have 2 more years (at least) in this home, might as well make it work for us! I've already started moving closets :) Tomorrow is the "big furniture" moving day!

Paxton John Calvin Golden

2011-11-26T21:43:00.003-06:00

What a big name for such a little dude!

On Monday, November 21, 2011, the beginning of our 40th week, we went in for our scheduled c-section. We didn't have to be there until 10 am, so that worked out perfectly. We were able to get up late and finish last minute cleaning, spend some quality time with the kiddos and head to the hospital early.

We arrived and were sent up to the fifth floor, labor and delivery. The nursery was empty as we strolled by and headed to room 526. Donovan was cool as a cucumber, but I was very antsy and scared about the procedure. I was still in high spirits as they hooked up my I.V. and gave me medicine to ensure I wouldn't drown in vomit-if my stomach decided during surgery to do so. I reached a point, though, where I didn't want to talk and was very anxious and scared. It's a point where I feel like I can't go through with the surgery and just want to unhook everything and run away. I didn't have much time to feel like this because before I knew it, they were wheeling me back to the operating room and starting my spinal block.

The surgery went very well. It started a little after 12 and Paxton was born at 12:21 pm. They let Donovan take great pictures of him being born and announce whether he was a boy or girl.

I thought it would've been a much more gruesome scene, but the doctors really clean up after themselves! He was a little lethargic when he was born, so the nurses took him to the nursery to get all cleaned up. My surgery was complete around 1:05 and I returned to the room. Paxton joined us around 3:00.

He sure is beautiful! 7lbs 11 oz. & 20 inches long.

39 Weeks

2011-11-14T12:54:00.002-06:00

39 Weeks

How far along: 39 weeks. 7 more days!

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a mini watermelon. Weighs about 7.25 lbs and measures about 20 inches.

Maternity clothes: All long shirts and maternity bottoms

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley Joy Anna Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Purchase a dresser for the baby!
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.
Making an outfit for baby! Says Pax down the side :)

Movement: Movement is still very limited. Baby is still head down so I feel hand and arm movements as well as kicks in my left side. Hiccups happen 3-4 times a day.

Sleeping: Although still drinking a ton of water, I am sleeping pretty good right now! The calm before the storm.

What I miss: Painting my toes without doing some type of yoga position.

Cravings: Still apples and cereal.

Symptoms: Acid reflux and heartburn. Ligament stretching. Cramping.

Weight Gained: Gained 37 pounds.

Baby's expected birthday: November 21, 2011

I had my last baby doctor appointment this morning. I scheduled my 3 week post-op appointment for Wednesday, December 7 @ 8:45. Everything looks great. Baby is still head down and is measuring right at 39 weeks. The heart rate went back up to 156. Although I am only dilated 1 cm, I am hoping to go into labor before the scheduled c-section! I'll be doing a lot of cleaning and organizing this week :) I may even do a few jumping jacks. I am trusting Christ to keep me safe and resting in his comfort looking forward to Monday. I can't wait to meet this little baby. To see his/her little face. To hold the little hands and feet. 7 more days. Actually: 6 days 22 hours 55 minutes.

38 Weeks

2011-11-07T13:32:00.005-06:00

38 Weeks

How far along: 38 weeks. 14 more days!

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a leek. Weighs about 6.8 lbs and measures about 19.75 inches.

Maternity clothes: All long shirts and maternity bottoms

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley Joy Anna Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Purchase a dresser for the baby!
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.
Making an outfit for baby! Says Pax down the side :)

Movement: Movement has decreased a lot. When I push on (what I assume) is the feet, they kick back. Other than the occasional rolling around, it's pretty tight in there.

Sleeping: I am waking up 2-3 times a night to use the bathroom.

What I miss: Putting on my shoes without feeling feet in my ribcage :)

Cravings: I've been eating a ton of apples and polished off a box of Golden Grahams this week.

Symptoms: Acid reflux and heartburn. Ligament stretching. Cramping.

Weight Gained: Gained 35 pounds. Lost a pound this week :)

Baby's expected birthday: November 21, 2011

LAST Dr. Appt.: Monday, November 14 @ 9:45
I had a dr appointment this morning. I dropped a pound. The baby's heart rate was 144. This is a big drop from the pretty constant 158-160 that it has been. For some reason, this leads me to think "boy", but I'll hold tight to my "girl" stance...just in case I'm right :) When she checked my cervix, she said that I am dialated to a 1 and slightly effaced. She said she didn't think I would make it to the 21st, but my kids are kind of stubborn (I think they get that from me) so we'll see. She also informed me that she got all my paperwork back from the hospital I had my csection with Halynd at. The type of closure that they performed was a 2 layer-which means that I am favorable to have a vbac! Donovan and I will see what happens, but hopefully we can bring baby Pax into the world without cutting mommy in half. Baby is head down and in a good position. I am extremely nervous about labor, so please be praying that God calms my nerves.

Pumpkin patch fun

2011-11-03T10:06:00.003-05:00

This past Saturday we were able to venture out to Farmland Adventures with the Metro families. I had never been there, but was told that it was worth driving out to. There were fun activities for the kiddos. We went through a mini corn maze that only took about 15 minutes, there was a real tractor hay ride, a pumpkin patch-where pumpkins grew freely and the kids could pick which was theirs, a corn box (Which Halynd loved), a petting zoo, pony rides and a bonfire (although, we did not stay for this...). The kids enjoyed themselves and I loved watching them experience feeding goats for the first time.

I really think we should have a farm or something like that. Both of my kids adore animals and think they are just "SO tute (cute)". At one point, Haly was trying to hug a goat through the fence and I had to stop her because it looked like the poor goats eyes were going to pop out of her head.

As a side note-props to all you mommies out there with two or more kiddos. I took this task on my own. The combination of two kids and being very pregnant--without the hubby--was rather difficult! While one wanted to look at the pumpkins out in the back nine of the patch, the other wanted to pet a cat. While both wanted to ride ponies, I had to rely on the worker to hold one kid on the pony, while I held the other. While one wanted to pet the goats, the other one was enthralled with the baby piglets. By the time we left, I was ready for a nice warm bath and bed! Let's just say that Walmart is a trip to the park compared to going somewhere like this! In all, the kids had a great time, the weather was beautiful and we were all ready to see daddy!

37 weeks

2011-10-31T11:24:00.003-05:00

We're in the final countdown here! 21 days! I had a doctor's appointment this morning hoping for some progress. Nope. Pax is quite comfortable and it doesn't look like he/she will be making an appearance anytime soon :) The doctor said I am not dialated at all. The baby's head is at a 0 station, so that's better than a -2 :) It really doesn't seem real yet that we will have another person in our little family. I saw a picture of a mom holding a newborn in a magazine in the doctor's office-I'm not going to lie-first hormonal experience--I almost cried thinking about what Pax will be like.

How far along: 37 weeks. 21 more days!

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a swiss chard (looks like a bunch of colorful kale). Weighs about 6.3 lbs and measures about 19.25 inches.

Maternity clothes: All long shirts and maternity bottoms

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley Joy Anna Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Purchase a dresser for the baby!
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.
Making an outfit for baby! Says Pax down the side :)

Movement: Movement has decreased a little. I feel movement on the bottom of my stomach now!

Sleeping: I am waking up 2-3 times a night to use the bathroom.

What I miss: I'm starting to miss eating without having heartburn or acid reflux!

Cravings: Just food.

Symptoms: Acid reflux and heartburn. Hungry! Have to pee alot!

Weight Gained: Gained 36 pounds. Made up for not gaining in 2 weeks :) This is going to be a big baby-Or I have a ton of amniotic fluid in there!

Baby's expected birthday: November 21, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Monday, November 7 @ 10:30
Halynd was born at 37 weeks, so we will see!

36 weeks and a Sick Weekend

2011-10-25T13:36:00.004-05:00

36 weeks!

Pregnancy Highlights:

How far along: 36 weeks. 27 more days!

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a crenshaw melon (a big cantaloupe type fruit). Weighs about 5.75 lbs and measures about 18.75 inches.

Maternity clothes: All long shirts and maternity bottoms (or comfy yoga pants)

Gender: Didn't find out! But want to know so I can wash baby clothes!!!

Names: Girl- Paxley Joy Anna Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Purchase a dresser for the baby!
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.
Wash all baby clothes-girl and boy!
Making an outfit for baby! Says Pax down the side :)

Movement: Movement has decreased a little. I know there's not very much room in there :)

Sleeping: I am waking up 2-3 times a night to use the bathroom.

What I miss: Putting on my own shoes :)

Cravings: Just food.

Symptoms: Acid reflux and heartburn. Hungry! Intense braxton hicks!

Weight Gained: Gained 32 pounds. Haven't gained any weight in 2 weeks. I actually lost a pound!

Baby's expected birthday: November 21, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Thursday, October 27 @9:00

Sick weekend!

Since Thursday of last week, our house was attacked by some viruses! The strange part is, they were mostly different. Not only were the daycare kiddos sick, but my two were sick as well! Malachi started us off on Thursday by running a high fever of 102 and just not feeling good at all. We got him to the clinic that morning and got him on some antibiotics (Cedax). He was diagnosed with a bad cold/infection. One of the daycare kiddos had a sinus infection, a couple others had colds. Halynd woke up Saturday with a low grade fever, so I took her into the clinic around 2 and she was placed on antibiotics as well-Supra (some penicillin drug). She was diagnosed with an Upper Respiratory Infection. By Saturday evening, despite the Tylenol and Motrin rotations, she was doing horribly. We kept a close eye on her. She woke up at 1 am with a 105.3 degree fever, was shaking and could hardly breath. We took her into the E.R. and they saw her immediately. By the time we were seen from when she woke up (I had given her more Tylenol), her fever was down to 102. The doctor listened to her chest and determined her cold had turned into bronchitis. He just said to continue her antibiotic and rotating pain relievers. She did very poorly the rest of the night and Sunday. Yesterday, we had a day of rest where the daycare kiddos stayed home. Malachi is almost completely better. He is still coughing up mucous occasionally and Halynd is not running a fever anymore. Her voice was pretty much gone because of her trouble with breathing for two days. She sounded like a little mouse and could hardly talk. She was coughing up liquid that looked just like water and had a lot of flem in it.

Today, they are both doing great! I didn't have to give Halynd any Tylenol all night long! The daycare kiddos are on the mend too. I hate when they are sick and there's nothing I can do but hold them and rub their backs. My kids handle being sick so strangely. They act like total boogers. I knew something was up last week when they were both disobeying, talking back, hitting each other, fighting, not listening, not being reasonable! I'm glad they are almost back to normal.

We were blessed with a baby shower this Saturday. It was a great time with friends celebrating the birth of this little baby. The food was wonderful, the decorations were adorable and the time we were all able to spend together was so much fun! The generous support and love from these families was amazing. Pictures to come soon.

Homemade Laundry Soap

2011-10-20T13:18:00.004-05:00

I was not a believer of home made laundry detergent. I'll just put that out there from the beginning. I was attached to my Tide with bleach and Downy fabric softeners. I had heard for quite a few years that there was an alternative to spending $17-20 a month on laundry detergent. I didn't even think about it for years because I was afraid it would not work nearly as well as the name brand or store bought/already made products. This is far, far from the truth! About a month ago, Donovan and I agreed to give the stuff a shot. We are extremely satisfied and LOVE the detergent. I don't know why more people use it! It is very inexpensive for the ingredients, takes about 5 minutes to put together, works and smells fantastic and leaves the clothes incredible clean and soft! There are two different ways to make the detergent, but each is just as great. And it's H/E safe!

We like powder detergent, so we found a recipe to make a powder version. To do this, all you need are 4 ingredients and a couple tools. You will need to buy Borax ($2.50), Super Washing Soda (Arm & Hammer)($2.65), Ivory bar soap($1.18/3 bars) (or another natural soap of your choice) and a bar of Fels Naptha ($.98). The original recipe does not call for the Fels Naptha, but we add it as a stain remover. All these ingredients are found in the laundry isle!

Instructions?-

Grate the bar of ivory,
grate 1/3 the bar of Fels Naptha
Add 1 cup Borax and 1 cup Super Washing Soda.
Mix very well. Put in a sealed container.
Use 1 tablespoon in each load or 2 for super dirty loads.

We still use our Gain fabric softener (because we are smell junkies), so we put a little of that in each load. When buying the ingredients, keep in mind that each box of Borax and Washing Soda make multiple batches of detergent. From three bars of Ivory, one bar of Fels Naptha, one box of Borax and one box of Washing Soda, we were able to make enough for 3 batches and still have over half the box of Borax and Washing Soda. For the mere cost of $7.31 we made enough detergent to last a LONG time :) When you only have to use a tablespoon, the stuff goes a lonnng way!

34 weeks

2011-10-13T13:52:00.003-05:00

Well! I am officially 34 weeks and 4 days along. I went to the doctor yesterday for my 2 week check up, so I have official stats :) Baby's heartrate was 156. Seems pretty consistent. My mouth about dropped to the floor as I exchanged a look with the nurse who weighed me. It seemed impossible to have gained 6 pounds in two weeks. Out of disbelief, I contributed it to my jeans and jacket I was wearing. She smiled, nodded and reassured me that pregnant women tend to gain weight. To my surprise-My scale at home said the same weight. This baby better be a big one! He/She is really going to be a Thanksgiving turkey!

Pregnancy Highlights:

How far along: 34 weeks. 39 days to go!

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a cantaloupe. Weighs about 4.75 lbs and measures about 17.75 inches.

Maternity clothes: Mostly long shirts and maternity bottoms.

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley Joy (Anna?) Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.
Wash all baby clothes-girl and boy!
Making an outfit for baby! Says Pax down the side :)

Movement: Lots of movement.There is not very much room in there and baby likes to turn from side to side. Baby uses my ribs as a launching board to turn.

Sleeping: Been pretty uncomfortable these past couple weeks!

What I miss: Sleeping on my stomach!

Cravings: Just food.

Symptoms: Acid reflux. Lots of Braxton Hicks. Low energy, but want to clean everything. Baby's feet are very boney!

Weight Gained: Gained 33 pounds. Can't wait to get to the gym and get some energy!

Baby's expected birthday: November 21, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Thursday, October 27 @9:00

Fun Week

2011-10-07T12:53:00.007-05:00

We had a lot of fun this week. I found some interesting recipes that were really simple and that the kids could help with. They had a blast. They are all at the age now where they love to help in the kitchen, so finding easy, toddler friendly recipes was a must!

We had success with our "Monkey Pancakes". The kids loved helping mix the batter and decorating their monkeys. They also didn't mind the fact that they had three M&M mini's to decorate their monkey face with!

We also ventured into making playdough. I had never used a recipe that you cook before. Blogs I've read and people I've talked to said that those last the longest, so we decided to give it a try. I would have honestly tried it sooner had I stocked up on Cream of Tarter...which most cooking recipes call for! Anyways, the recipe was very easy. The kids loved helping measure the ingredients. Their favorite part was choosing which colors to use. We stored the extra in old baby food jars I had in the cabinet since Halynd was little bitty.

The recipe:
1 Cup Flour
1 Cup Water
2 tsp Cream of Tarter
1/4 Cup Salt
1 Tbsp Vegetable Oil
Food coloring
Sparkles (if you want)

1. Mix all ingredients in a pot. Stir until all clumps are out.
2. Heat over medium heat while continually stirring.
3. Cook until it forms a massive clump.
4. Remove from heat and knead. (You may want to wait a minute...it was hot!).
5. Separate and choose colors. Add sparkles if you desire.

We used Neon food coloring as well as some primary colors. The Neon creates such pretty, bright colors! We also tripled the recipe because we needed enough for 7 kiddos to enjoy!

Then we had to make some ice cream out of it :)

Meal Planning

2011-10-02T21:02:00.003-05:00

I sit down once a week and plan meals. My ultimate dream in meal planning world is to do a monthly meal plan and just shop for perishables weekly (bread, milk, fruit, fresh veggies). BUT for now, I do it weekly :) It works out alright because coupons expire so fast nowadays. I have a new plan to make what we are having for dinner for lunch! We always have at least half of what I make left over after dinner & I'm the only one that eats leftovers! And I wanted to save some money-so we will give this a try! I will have a sandwich, veggie chips and fruit for lunch or a salad and offer that to the kids as well so they aren't overwhelmed with two dinners :) We have small group Tuesdays and dinner is usually provided by a volunteer :)

This is our menu for the week:
Monday-

Breakfast-Monkey Pancakes with a banana & milk.
Lunch/Dinner- Taco salad with black beans and corn.

Tuesday-

Breakfast-Smoothies with granola & milk.
Lunch- Turkey dog mummies, fruit salad and mixed veggies.

Wednesday-

Breakfast-Eggs in a nest, apple slices & milk.
Lunch/Dinner-Crock pot beef stroganoff, salad, golden raspberries.

Thursday-

Breakfast-French toast sticks, grapes & milk.
Lunch/Dinner-Roasted Rosemary Pork, homemade Parmesan fries and fresh green beans.

Friday-

Breakfast-Honeynut Cheerios, strawberries & milk.
Lunch/Dinner-Bruschetta chicken bake, broccoli, salad & garlic bread.

There are a couple fun breakfast recipes that we will be trying out in the next few weeks. I love looking for new recipes or new ways to make the same old dish. A couple fun ones I'm looking forward to are: Rainbow Waffles & Peanut butter and banana wraps. Some fun lunch ideas I can't wait to make: Hotdog spaghetti & Octopus hotdogs. There are so many fun snack ideas out there too. I love pinterest.

My Guy Chi

2011-09-28T13:51:00.003-05:00

How on earth did this little boy become SO big?!!

On September 18, Chi turned 4. It's weird thinking that he is 4 years old! I cannot believe how big he is and how much he talks. Some things about Chi:

He still weighs 33 pounds and is 41 inches tall!
He is wearing size 9 shoe and 4T clothes.
He loves to watch movies and will sit through it entirely.
His favorite things to do are to color (or anything with art), ride his bike, play at the park and playing any kind of game.
He LOVES superheros or anything in that area.
He knows his ABC's, can count to 20 and knows all his shapes and colors.
He is a big time Daddy's boy. He's very much into dirt, fixing things, being outside, and copying anything Donovan does.
Some of his favorite things to eat are-Corn, Broccoli or carrots dipped in Ranch, Spaghetti, Mac n Cheese, ANY fruit, pizza and peanut butter and jelly...the boy could LIVE off of peanut butter and jelly. Oh and chocolate milk. We just had a talk today about how chocolate milk is a treat and how even though he wants it all the time, he can't have it. That it will hurt his teeth and make the dentist have to fix them. He understands and requested water at lunch :)

He's becoming such a logical thinker. He likes to negotiate and does a pretty good job at it :) He is understanding how to use words instead of hitting or crying to get what he wants. He still has lovely meltdowns occasionally when he is tired or really wants/to do something. He is becoming more reasonable though. I just keep thinking that this is only a season.

And it is such a sweet season too. He often comes into our bed early in the morning. He is the best snuggler. Sometimes he gets a little crazy and uses my shoulder blade as a pillow or my legs as a place to toss his legs, but for the most part, we don't even know he's there anymore. He sneaks into the spot between Donovan and I and just cuddles up. I'm usually awake when he gets in bed and I love watching him when he thinks I am asleep. The look on his face is adorable. Something that just melts my heart is when he says, "I love you so much, Mommy. Forever ever".

I love you too my baby boy. Forever and ever and ever.

All he wanted for his birthday from Mommy and Daddy. A Bumblebee Transformer suit. Sweet, birthday (check), Halloween (check), dress up all the time (check).

32 Weeks!

2011-09-26T16:29:00.003-05:00

How far along: 32 weeks.

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a large Jicama. Weighs about 3.75 lbs and measures about 16.7 inches.

Maternity clothes: Mostly long shirts and maternity bottoms. I did happen to discover that I can button two of my prepregnancy jeans :)

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley Joy Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.
Have a garage sale to earn money for diapers and wipes!
Wash all baby clothes-girl and boy!

Movement: Lots of movement. I am starting to notice a sleep/wake pattern. This baby gets the hiccups all the time! And loves to stretch out.

Sleeping: Sleeping pretty well...usually. Still waking 1-2 times to use the bathroom.

What I miss: Bending over ;)

Cravings: LOTS of cereal!

Symptoms: Acid reflux. Lots of Braxton Hicks.

Weight Gained: Gained 26 pounds.

Due Date: Scheduled the birth at the last doctors appointment. If I make it this far:
November 21, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Tuesday, September 27, 2011 @9:30am. Start my 2 week check ups.

We're having lots of fun talking to Malachi and Halynd about the baby coming. Malachi keeps asking if baby Pax is big enough and has eaten enough to come out of my belly :) I'm not sure if he quite gets that there is a real life baby that will soon be in our home. I keep showing them pictures of newborns hoping they will get it. We shall see :)

59 days

2011-09-23T14:00:00.003-05:00

There are 59 days (or less) until Baby Pax is being evicted-(not by my wishes). I. am. freaking. out. Three. Three kids. I keep having scenarios go through my mind of public outings. You know, the ones where I'm in Wal*mart with three children attempting to make it out of the store alive. Or the really scary situations where I will have to cross a road or something with three children while toting around a diaper/pull up/extra clothes bag-while holding a 4 and 2 year olds hands....while carrying a baby.

Or the even scarier situations...like going to the park with three children. I'll be alternating between pushing someone on the tire swing and helping someone climb up the rock wall and making sure someone keeps their clothes on. Ahem.

I'm honestly very nervous about having three children. I've just gotten into the groove with two...almost. Just when you think you're in the groove, they like to show you up and change. I'm overwhelmingly excited about meeting this little baby, but this nervousness is making me....nervous!

It's the final countdown and I am looking forward to newborn diapers (pampers of course-oh! How they smell divine!), tiny clothes and socks, Chi and Haly to meet their brother or sister and so much more. I can't wait to see this little baby for the first time. I'm already in love with every little kick (except the rib and bladder shots) and hiccup. I can't wait for Donovan to be a daddy again. He's such a great daddy. The best, I think.

I'm extremely nervous about the C-Section. I know I've been through it once and recovered quite well, but there's just something about it, maybe the being cut in half while in the position of a crusifixtion...that makes me so entirely freaked out :)

So. 59 days. Until we are the parents of three children. I can't wait!

This is what our life has come to :) A family of Five!

29 Weeks & A Difficult Weekend!

2011-09-06T13:47:00.003-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 29 weeks.

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a butternut squash. Weighs about 2.5 lbs and measures about 15.25 inches.

Maternity clothes: All maternity shorts, dresses and long shirts.

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley JoyAnna Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Find carseat cover pattern.
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.

Movement: I think this baby is transverse. I am constantly feeling a large, round, hard object in my right side and 2 boney objects on my bladder. I also feel a lot of kicking in my pelvis.

Sleeping: Woke up to pee for the first time with this pregnancy! Must be all the water I'm drinking?

What I miss: Sleeping soundly

Cravings: Orange juice!

Symptoms: This belly is getting big! Baby seems to have popped out of my pelvis for now and is hanging on a ledge. Awesome head cold (Although, that has to be from the weather dropping down into the 40's from the 100's)

Weight Gained: Gained 26 pounds.

Due Date: Scheduled the birth at the last doctors appointment. If I make it this far:
November 21, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 @3:15. Start my 3 week check ups.

We had quite the weekend. Luckily, Saturday was the beginning of Football season, so Donovan spent the ENTIRE day on the couch watching game day. It was a very relaxing day. After church Sunday we wanted to take the kiddos camping. We haven't taken them camping once this summer because it has been extremely hot! We invited a family to go with us-they have two boys Chi and Haly's age, so it works out great! On our way there (about 45 mins into the trip) we smelled something awful. It's a smell that we knew all too well considering our Jeep Liberty blew the radiator in July.(Said Liberty is still sitting in the driveway waiting to be fixed-so we've been using one car-Donovan's Jeep Wrangler). The temp shot up in the Jeep and fluid filled the windshield. We all pulled over and watched in disbelief as Donovan opened the hood and smoke blew out. We decided to attempt fixing it because Donovan believed it would be a quick fix.

So, after my friend and I stayed with the two older boys at Dollar General for about an hour and a half, the guys ran with the smaller ones to pick up parts and grab another car. After getting the other car (which seats 8, gloriously) we loaded up all the camping stuff and headed with the kiddos to camp. We were teetering on going back home and camping in the back yard, but we didn't want to disappoint the kids! So, us women set up camp while the men attempted to fix the Jeep. It ended up-the men didn't have the right size tools to finish the job, so they just met us at the camp spot and fixed it on the way home.

We had a great time camping. The kids slept great and loved being outside, getting dirty, eating gummies and juice and roasting marshmallows. The trip didn't go as smoothly as we planned, but we still had a great time and were blessed so much by the patience and willingness to help from our friends. It honestly could have been an extremely stressful situation, but the attitudes our friends had were so laid back that it made it so much easier to just enjoy each other. Even when we were stranded on the side of the highway. Even when we were watching our boys be dinosaurs in the dirt and gravel behind a gas station. Even when we spent a very long time in Dollar General and probably annoyed the daylights out of the cashiers with all the noise we were making. I can't even express how blessed we feel to have such friends.

As a side note. Donovan and I were lent our friends car, so we went back to the Jeep with the right parts and fluids and fixed it! Donovan said it is running better than it ever has (in the whole 6 months we've owned it). So, although it was very disheartening and frustrating, God provides. Not only the finances to fix the Jeep. Not only patience to work through yet another car problem. But God provides the grace and peace to us in getting that darn hunk of metal fixed. For now.

Grace for the Good Girl

2011-09-01T13:05:00.003-05:00

I have never really seen myself as hiding behind a mask. I have thought of myself as a transparent, open person. That was until I started reading a book. (Emily Freeman-"Grace for the Good Girl)

It's funny how you chase a dream.

I always look forward to tax season. We can tie a lot of loose ends, purchase items that we don't necessarily need but have been wanting, pay off debts. It's funny how when something comes up, such as a broken down car, it can alter those plans drastically. Even when tax season is still months away!

Being completely transparent, our family car has been broken down since the 4th of July. We have another car, but it so happens to be a Jeep Wrangler. It has 4 seats, a lift kit, the top can be removed and there is NO air conditioning. All these statements make me seem like a complete brat, but please, give me the benefit of the doubt this time. I am pregnant. Not that this is an excuse to complain-because it is not! But the months of July and August were cruel. It was HOT. Whenever we wanted to go somewhere as a family it has been painstakingly obnoxious. Having two doors on the Jeep is not easy with 2 carseats. Crawling up with the kids is difficult, as is buckling their seats. The days where it was not so hot were no big deal, but for a majority of the summer, the sun was blazing!

Not to say that I do not feel extremely blessed to have transportation, because I do, but it sure is difficult! Needless to say, we are in the market for another family car. We are afraid the damage to our Jeep Liberty will take much time, money and effort. Of which-we are lacking in the money area :) Slowly, God is opening doors and shaping us to realize where our money goes and what is important.

God blessed Donovan with an amazing new job a couple of months ago and this has proven to drastically change his income. I am blessed with the opportunity to stay home with my kiddos while still being able to contribute to the family income. So, we know what we are going through will be shaping us. In all seriousness, not having an extra "comfortable" car has been hard, but in the end. It's not going to matter. Yup, I said that. What's going to matter is taking care of our family. And God is providing for us to do that.

It's time to stop hiding behind the mask.
It's a dream chasing kind of mask.
The one that gets you disappointed with where you are at in life.

Where it seems life is mundane and days are planned out according to lunchtime, learning time, naptime, snacktime, dinnertime, bath time and bed time. The truth is-even if it is mundane-my kids won't be 2 and 3 for long-and it's my life right now. They will remember all those times where I took my time to invest in them-pray with them, read with them, play with them.

They won't care if they've had a bath or go to bed on time.
They don't care if they are riding in a Jeep Wrangler or a decked out minivan (you know, the ones with the tv's?)
They don't care if they are potty trained or not.

Jesus is slowly molding my heart. He's taught me to really appreciate my family and not focus so much on what is here on this earth. I'm finding extreme joy in Jesus and putting all my hope in him.

Instead of a broken down car.
Instead of finances.
Instead of my "dreams" of this earth.

5 years!

2011-08-30T09:50:00.003-05:00

Donovan and I celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary this Friday, the 26th. We were able to have a kid free weekend-thanks to his parents! We decided to go camping in Branson at the Wilderness. It was so fun! We left Friday evening at 6 and arrived in time to set up camp before dark. We were the only campers all weekend!

We went and saw "The Planet of the Apes" in an Imax theatre. It was both of our first experiences with an Imax and we were blown away. While we were waiting for the movie to start, we did a few calculations. Our house is about 1,500 sq. ft. The Imax screen was over 4,800 sq. ft. Our house could have fit on the screen 3 times over. That is insane! The monkeys were gigantic and the movie was pretty good :)

Saturday we decided to sleep in! We slept all the way until 7:30...a.m. Ha! I guess that's sleeping in for us now. After we went and ate breakfast-
We lounged around the campsite, went swimming, watched movies on the Ipad, read. We also got a little shopping at the outlets accomplished too. That night, we went and saw the New Shanghai Circus.
It. was. awesome. We were in awe the entire show trying to figure out how these people could maneuver their bodies in such ways. It was beautiful and exciting to watch! We ended the night with salad and breadsticks at Olive Garden-which was open until 11:00!

Sunday we slept in again! This time we did a little better. We were able to stay asleep until 8:45! This was quite a feat. I think we were a little extra tired. See, I had a couple dreams Saturday night. One reoccuring dream that woke us up in a panic 3 times. In my dream (which I thought I was awake)-there was a gigantic black and yellow spider descending down onto Donovan from the ceiling of the tent! I woke up two times screaming. Donovan, quite alarmed, freaked out too. From a dead sleep. I asked for the flash light and he obliged-knowing I was half asleep and crazed. I pointed the flash light to the ceiling....there was NO spider. This happened twice. The third time I woke up in a panic it was because there was a raccoon digging through our used water bottles and aluminum cans we had stored in a walmart bag. I shined the flashlight out at him to let him know I was on to his sneaky ways and he scurried off. After that-we slept like babies. We had some cinnamon rolls and chocolate milk for breakfast and just sat and enjoyed each other. We played some Area 51 where Donovan seriously handed it to me! He's a great shot :) Check out was 11 am, so we packed up, loaded up and headed out to do some more outlet shopping. There were some great deals. I would've spent A LOT of money had my hubby not kept me accountable. I'm talking OshKosh, Carter's, Disney, Gymboree, Children's Place...oh my!! We walked in and walked out without damage :) Disney store got a little of our business, as well as Pacsun, but that was it! We came home to our cuties and missed them a ton! They were happy to see us, but definitely in no hurry to come home. It was a great weekend.

28 Weeks

2011-08-30T09:25:00.003-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 28 weeks. Started my 3rd trimester this week (I thought it was 27...it's 28!)!

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a Chinese Cabbage. Weighs about 2.25 lbs and measures about 14.8 inches.

Maternity clothes: All maternity shorts, dresses and long shirts. Found some good deals on tank tops this weekend :)

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley JoyAnna Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Find a couple more cute neutral outfits.
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.

Movement: Very active baby now! Loves when I eat :)

Sleeping: Baby seems to have moved off my sciatic nerve...for now.

What I miss: Sleeping on my stomach.

Cravings: Lots of fresh fruits and veggies.

Symptoms: Some very noticeable Braxton Hicks.

Weight Gained: Gained 25.8 pounds.

Due Date: Scheduled the birth at the last doctors appointment. If I make it this far:
November 21, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Friday, September 9, 2011 @3:30. Started my 3 week check ups.

Two certain cuties showing their baby bellies.

Crib bedding for sale

2011-08-25T14:04:00.004-05:00

The time has come. I think I am a borderline hoarder. I have dreams of keeping this bedding for Malachi in hopes that he one day gets married and wants to use his perfect condition crib bedding for his children. That's if God wants him married. That's if he even has children. So, instead of keeping it in a zipped, airproof package for another 20 years, I am parting ways. I guess you really can't take crib bedding with you after you die, now can you? And Zanzibar jungle theme does NOT really match rocket ships...or birds...

We loved this bedding set for Malachi. It is called Zanzibar. We bought it from Kid's Quarters. It comes with the matching lamp,

rug,
2 sets of matching Zanzibar curtains,

a lion head that hangs on the wall
and

matching wall hangings.

Included in the crib set is the quilt, bumper pads, fitted sheet and
diaper stacker.

The whole set is very neutral and could be used for either a girl or boy. We adore this set and you can still buy even more accessories for the nursery online!

If you know anyone who would be interested in this set, please shoot me an email: meghan_116@yahoo.com

Or visit the craigslist posting here

27 weeks

2011-08-22T13:52:00.003-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 27 weeks. Started my 3rd trimester today!

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a head of cauliflower. Weighs about 2 lbs and measures about 14.5 inches.

Maternity clothes: All maternity shorts, dresses and long shirts. I'm in the market for a Bella Band and some new shirts :)

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley JoyAnna Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Find a couple more cute neutral outfits.
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.

Movement: A lot of leg movement. Pax's heels have found my ribs. Weird flutters above my pelvic bone. Baby seems to favor my left side.

Sleeping: Still depends-sometimes the bed is just so comfortable! Other times...

What I miss: I kind of want some soda!

Cravings: Lots of fresh fruits and veggies. Sweet tea :)

Symptoms: Passed my Glucose test (YAY!) but doctor said I am anemic, so I need to start taking more iron. Doctor also said I am measuring a week ahead! I have also had quite a few Braxton Hicks.

Weight Gained: Gained 23 pounds.

Due Date: Scheduled the birth at the last doctors appointment. If I make it this far:
November 21, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Wednesday, September 7, 2011 @4. Started my 3 week check ups.

This is the best picture I've every gotten of these two cuties. They actually WANTED their picture taken and posed!

Household Notebook

2011-08-17T13:19:00.003-05:00

I have been contemplating how to organize our little details of life into a managable form. It is often difficult for me to keep up with the million little tasks of every day. Just this morning while I was going over the preschool lesson with the kids, I was day dreaming about cleaning my windows with windex and newspaper and mopping my kitchen floor with hot water and bleach. I quickly realized this and snapped back to reality.

The reality is: I need a handy dandy notebook. I would like to gather my recipes, chore lists, food menus, finances (budget) and all the other little loose ends to keep track of. I am going to begin compiling a binder of all these details of our life. That way-I can shop in bulk instead of every week (except for milk and produce), I can pay all the bills with the paper copy at hand and a copy of the budget easily available and plan better.

I also feel that if I had a chore list of daily, weekly and monthly duties, I will get them accomplished timely and not be so overwhelmed. I have a couple ideas of where to start. There are some awesome printables here.

25 weeks and a 2 year check up

2011-08-15T13:54:00.009-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 25 weeks.

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a rutabega (I had to look this one up!). Weighs about 1.5 lbs and measures about 13.5 inches.

Maternity clothes: All maternity shorts, dresses and long shirts. Baby has come out of my pelvis and cause my belly to pop out!

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley JoyAnna Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Going to use Halynd's crib bedding if a girl.
Got a neutral hospital outfit.
Donovan actually looked at baby clothes with me! (Boy ones of course)
Cleaned all the carpets! Will do again in November :)

Goals:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Find a couple more cute neutral outfits.
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.

Movement: Starting to get hiccups. If I lean on my belly and happen to squish Pax, that baby sure tells me!

Sleeping: Depends. Some nights I sleep great. Other nights I wake often and am very uncomfortable.

What I miss: Peanut butter! (Causes major heartburn!)

Cravings: Lots of fresh fruits and veggies. French fries dipped in vinegar!

Symptoms: Still having random bouts of lower back/pelvic pain. May talk to my doctor about SPD-when your pelvic bones are not aligned an cause a lot of pain during pregnancy. The cure-giving birth :)

Woke up with leg cramps for the first time :) Yay!

Weight Gained: Gained 22 pounds. Only one pound this week!

Due Date: November 27, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Wednesday, August 17, 2011 @2:45 for the Glucose Test.

A certain two year old little girl had her check up on Friday. She went with daddy and loved every second of time they got to spend together. She weighed in at a whopping 23.6 lbs and is 30 inches tall. She is in the 3rd percentile for her age (25 months). She got two shots and a finger prick.

The finger prick allowed us to learn that she is anemic. I don't know if it runs in the family, but I am borderline anemic and Malachi was anemic when he was younger. This can be a tricky situation because Iron is an essential mineral in the production of red blood cells. And red blood cells are very important as they deliver oxygen to the entire body! With a low supply of red blood cells, the body has a hard time growing and can cause behavior issues.

The doctor just recommended that we give her Flintstones with Iron and a little bit of orange juice every morning and to come for a recheck in 3 months. We were giving her the Flintstone vitamin with Immunity support, but we made the switch Saturday morning. She also recommended only giving her about 16 ounces of milk a day because the calcium in the milk can cause iron to be depleted. So far-we're doing just what the doctor ordered. I'm going to be adding a few more helpings of iron rich foods into her diet such as more eggs, peanut butter, hummus and oatmeal. She already eats these, but will be eating them more often!

She is advanced in her vocabulary, as 2 year olds are "supposed to" only say 2-3 word sentences. This girl will talk you in circles with sentences. She is developmentally on target-she knows her Abc's and recognizes what letters are. She can count to 10 (with help past 5). She runs, jumps, hops, skips, and climbs (everything). She is quite skilled with a crayon and loves to draw with markers. I am randomly finding notebooks and calendars with her "writings" all over them. We are learning where it is apropriate to color. She still has random bouts of "two year old behavior". But she is becoming reasonable. The biggest struggles with her right now are walking in stores instead of riding in the cart, walking in parking lots and refusing to hold our hand, sitting still for longer than 3 minutes and potty training. Ohhhhh, the potty training. She. Is. Stubborn.

24 weeks

2011-08-08T15:58:00.003-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 24 weeks.

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of an ear of corn. Weighs about 1.25 lb and measures about 12.5 inches.

Maternity clothes: All maternity shorts, dresses and long shirts. This baby is SO low!

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley Anna Elizabeth Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Getting Ready:

Picked out bedding.
Got a neutral hospital outfit.
Got another outfit for $2.24 at Target! It's pink :)

Goals:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Find a couple more cute neutral outfits.
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.

Movement: Lots of movement. Painful jabs from elbows, feet, head and butt.

Sleeping: Figured out how to sleep comfortably. But that has changed! I'm not sure-must just depend on how the baby is laying?

What I miss: Peanut butter! (Causes major heartburn!)

Cravings: Lots of fresh fruits and veggies. And of course there's pop tarts and everything else I shouldn't buy (and don't-we can't afford it! :)

Symptoms: Still having random bouts of lower back/pelvic pain.

Weight Gained: Gained 21 pounds....gaining faster!

Due Date: November 27, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Wednesday, August 17, 2011 @2:45 for the Glucose Test.

23 weeks!

2011-08-01T07:47:00.002-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 23 weeks.

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a large mango. Weighs about 1.1 lb and measures about 11.5 inches.

Maternity clothes: All maternity shorts, dresses and long shirts. This baby is SO low!

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley Anna Elizabeth Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Baby Goals/Accomplished: Picked out bedding. Got a neutral hospital outfit.

Goals:

Stock up on Newborn-Size 2 diapers.
Find a couple more cute neutral outfits.
Make "Pax" beanie for hospital.

Movement: Lots of movement. Strange, but mostly on the left side and just above my pelvic bone.

Sleeping: Figured out how to sleep comfortably. One pillow under my head, on my side with a pillow between my knees. OR on my back with a pillow under my knees with just one pillow under my head. It relieves back pressure really well.

What I miss: Mexican food!

Cravings: Lots of fresh fruits and veggies. And the occasional Strawberry Toaster Strudel :)

Symptoms: Still having random bouts of lower back/pelvic pain.

Weight Gained/Lossed: Gained 19 pounds....so far.

Due Date: November 27, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Wednesday, August 17, 2011 @2:45 for the Glucose Test.

The decor bug

2011-07-27T14:19:00.004-05:00

I've never really been a decorator. I enjoy art and love creating, but wasn't very bothered by the fact that I've lived in this home for 2 years, come September, and have hardly even a picture on the wall. Well, thanks to all the influence around me, that has changed! In my free time, I love to look at blogs and websites that are designed to help with decorating. I am developing a style and realizing how much clutter and unnecessary "things" we have. Now that I have my head on straight :) I have decided to begin giving our home some girly style.

I did buy a mirror to go above our dresser and was pretty excited. Not only did I get it on sale, but it was a step in the right direction!

Starting with the kids rooms. Depending on the sex of this little one due in November, we are going to revamp the kids rooms. Malachi has had a "cars" theme since he got a big boy bed and mommy is ready to give his room a little change. I found an adorable rocket ship themed bedding set at Target and Malachi agrees-it's pretty awesome! It is done in basic boyish colors of Navy blue, light blue, white, green and brown. Even if baby Pax turns out to be a girl (like I think), we are still going to do his room around Christmas time.

Halynd's room is pretty cute. I just found a crib set to match with her theme. When she moves into a twin bed (which won't be until she's 13 because she still weighs a mere 22 lbs!) we are making her room a bird theme. The color scheme is still the same and will match her decor-Pink, light pink, brown, light brown, green and light green. Her dressers are a light green color, so we are wanting to stick with that~

The next phase is to hang up some pictures and art work up in this joint! :) And then find a corner kitchen table for cheap that we can fix up. Kind of like this one...

Or more like this one...with dark wood!

22 Weeks

2011-07-25T08:50:00.004-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 22 weeks.

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a spaghetti squash. Weighs about 1 lb and measures about 11 inches.

Maternity clothes: All maternity shorts, dresses and long shirts :)

Gender: Didn't find out!

Names: Girl- Paxley Anna Elizabeth Golden

Boy- Paxton John Calvin Golden

Movement: Lots of movement!

Sleeping: Figured out how to sleep comfortably. One pillow under my head, on my side with a pillow between my knees.

What I miss: Sleeping on my stomach!

Cravings: I've gotten to a point where I'm hungry, but I am not sure what for! Very irritating :)

Symptoms: Was having extreme lower back pain. My chiropractor friend adjusted my neck and back and I'm already feeling MUCH better.

Weight Gained/Lossed: Gained 18 pounds....so far.

Due Date: November 27, 2011

Next Dr. Appt.: Wednesday, August 17, 2011 @2:45 for the Glucose Test.

21 weeks and some cuties

2011-07-19T13:34:00.004-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 21 Weeks

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a banana. Measures 10.5 inches long and about 12.7 ounces.

Maternity Clothes: Wearing all maternity capris/shorts. I also love my comfortable work out clothes. Even though I'm not working out anytime soon :)

Gender: I have a hunch-girl. Donovan is convinced it's a boy-that God wouldn't give him another girl. Haly is quite 2 right now.

Names: Girl- Paxley Anna Elizabeth Golden
Boy-Paxton John Calvin Golden

Movement: Baby is very low and I can often feel when he/she shifts positions. Pretty uncomfortable!

Sleeping: I'm trying to sleep as best as I can. I am often woken up by my lower back hurting :(

What I miss: Sleeping on my belly and my back!

Cravings: Nothing crazy. Just NO Mexican food!

Symptoms: Terrible lower back pain. More frequent now. Dr. gave me some exercises to do that should lengthen the space between my vertebra to give me relief.

Due Date: November 27, 2011

Next Dr. Appointment: (Appointment yesterday went well. Baby's heart rate is 158. They had trouble finding it because baby was moving around so much)

Wednesday, August 17 @ 2:45 for the glucose reading.

Some Cuties:

Chi is a typical boy. He found a new liking. Mommy does NOT like it. His uncle let him shoot a BB gun for the first time. (It wasn't loaded in this picture)

Halynd is a character and a 1/2. She retold me the book "Pinkalicious" the other day while Donovan was fixing the car.

One of our friends sent me a link to make this chalk paint. The kids loved it!

Finally found it! The bed set I want. Only one issue. The duvet cover ALONE costs $150! Oh well, I'll keep shopping :)

Party Time!

2011-07-12T13:22:00.003-05:00

We had Halynd's birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese. 2 is such a busy age! We also had Chi's 2nd birthday there and he loved it and could go wild. Lots of fun friends showed up to celebrate. They all had a great time. The only one melting down was Halynd. She was extremely tired by present and cake time!

Her princess cupcakes

Chi and Haly actually liked Chuck E. this time!

Some sweet friends who came to the party.

Present time!

The presents : )

After a much needed nap, I took the kiddos to the promenade. We love going when it is closed so we can walk around and enjoy the different fountains without having to worry about people walking around everywhere. It was still extremely hot outside at 8 o'clock, so we chilled out with some Yum Yo's. Malachi chose Rootbeer and Vanilla yogurt with gummy sharks and watermelon candy. Halynd got Rootbeer a'la mode and gummies. Strange combos, but whatever floats their boat :)

This is my favorite pic of these two!

Halynd's 2! Birth Story.

2011-07-11T13:14:00.004-05:00

I can't believe my baby girl is 2.

I went into the hospital on July 9, 2009 because I was having weird, irregular contractions. I was already dialated to a 4/5 and 90% effaced, so I thought this was it. My water hadn't broken, but my back was very sore and I was having inconsistent contractions. At the time, Donovan's brother and sister were in town visiting, so we asked a couple friends to let them stay at their house-along with Malachi.

We waited in the room watching the monitors and everything seemed to look fine. I was indeed having contractions, but they said I wasn't in active labor yet. They decided to monitor me for another hour before we could head home. It's a good thing they did.

The monitors hooked to my stomach started to beep loudly and this prompted nurses to run into the room. Donovan and I were falling asleep, as it was already 9:30 at night and we were exhausted. The nurses told me to switch positions and to get off my back. So. I rolled over to my side and the beeping on the monitors stopped immediately. The nurses kept us longer now. Anytime I would sit in an upright position, Halynd's heart rate would drop durastically. The doctor came into the room and explained to us the situation. He was very calm and this lead us to believe that we were about to be told to go home and get some rest.

Instead, he very smoothly said that the baby is in distress when a contraction comes. This distress drops the heart rate significantly. And he recommended taking to baby right away. I was extremely mad. Not at anyone in particular. Not at Halynd. I was very mad that I had to be sliced open on an operating table. That my birth plan wasn't going to be followed. That I couldn't labor for my little girl. I saw a black tunnel as the doctor was leaving. I was in a very dark place and couldn't come out. It was hard to hear and see. I hardly paid attention to Donovan as he tried to reassure me and pray with me. I was more scared than at any other point in my entire life. This fear caused me to be so mad.

They came in to give me an I.V. and prep my body. I was given a pill for any nausea. Donovan was told to go to a locker room where he could change into a set of scrubs for the procedure.
They wheeled me into the operating room where the lights were extremely bright. I still could not come out of this anger that raged in me. The nurses hunched me over and stroked my hair as the anesthesiologist administered the spinal block. They quickly laid me down and strapped my arms in a cross like fashion. They pulled up a big cloth screen so I couldn't see anything. Donovan was brought into the room and he sat at my left side. Before the procedure, they used a tool and pinched my skin to see if I was numb. They said I should be numb up to my armpits.

I was not numb. I could feel the pinching, no matter where they pinched. They asked Donovan to leave, sat me back up and administered another spinal block. By this point I was even more scared. Donovan came back in and sat by me once more. They went through their routine again. This time, when they pinched me, I couldn't feel it and for that I was very grateful.

They began the procedure. After a lot of tugging and pulling, Halynd Zara Grace Golden was born at 12:35 a.m. on Friday, July 10, 2009. She weighed in at 6 lbs 12 oz. and was 19 inches long.

20 Weeks

2011-07-11T12:53:00.004-05:00

I am officially to the halfway point with this pregnancy. At times, it has seemed to take forever to get here (waiting for the ultrasound appointment) and at other times, the weeks just keep passing by. Before I know it, it's been another week and my belly gets bigger and wider :)

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 20 Weeks

Size of Baby Pax: About the size of a cantaloupe. Measures 6.5 inches long and about 10.6 ounces.

Maternity Clothes: Tried a pair of maternity capris on this weekend, but they are still baggy. Either I was bigger with the other two...or will fill out. Hopefully not because it's too big in the thigh area!

Gender: We had our ultrasound Thursday, but we didn't find out. It was extremely hard. I keep trying to convince Donovan to let me ask the Ultrasound tech, but he won't let me :)

Movement: Lots of quickening movement. It feels almost like a twitch. Other times it's just lots of light popping.

Sleeping: I think I've begun preparing for the newborn stage. Every little noise in the house makes me jump awake.

What I miss: Sleeping on my belly and my back! I have tried sleeping on my stomach but it's a little uncomfortable now.

Cravings: Nothing crazy. Lots of fruit and salad.

Symptoms: I thought I was getting acid reflux (Like with Malachi) but I just had a bug. Other than having a hard time picking up children and objects on the floor-I'm just pretty tired.

Due Date: I've always said November 28, but the dr. informed me it's always been the 27, SO
November 27, 2011

Next Dr. Appointment: Monday, July 18 @4 pm.

A Day in the Life-Thursday

2011-07-08T08:40:00.004-05:00

Baby Pax 19 weeks 4 days

*Disclaimer: I keep out (for the benefit of readers) any stories of puke, pee and poop. But, I can assure you-there are many interesting stories throughout the day. Especially with a handful of kids between the ages of 2 and 4!

The much anticipated date of 7/7/11 finally came! I woke up super excited because it was ultrasound day! My alarm went off at 7 and I got up to get ready for the day. This is what i woke up to....We need a King size bed!

Halynd was fast awake at 7:15. The first thing she says to me is not, "Good morning, Mama!" No, it's "I wanna p-butter samich and milk." I fixed her a 'samich' just in time for the daycare kiddos to arrive at 7:30. My kids could live off of peanut butter, ranch and milk.

Chi woke up at 8. He slept 11 glorious hours, so he woke up very happy. He always goes to the bathroom and then goes into his room to get dressed when he wakes up. I made eggs, toast & hashbrowns for breakfast. Chi actually ate all the eggs! He went through a weird stage where he didn't like-I think-the texture. I cleaned up breakfast and folded, put away, started another load of laundry.

The kids were anxious to go outside, so we spent a majority of the morning with bubbles, playing outside in the sand ridden sand box and played some soccer. We relaxed for a bit when we came inside and played in the kids' rooms. They have a way with toys. A room can be perfectly clean. Then, enter children. We are still working on the process of cleaning up one toy and moving on to another.

Lunch was a delicious tuna sandwich (my son despises tuna, but I still make it for him. He dips it in ranch :), carrots with ranch, applesauce and milk. After lunch, we cleaned up, had a potty break and laid down for a story. The kiddos had trouble falling asleep today. They were all out by 1:15 ish. Malachi did not take a nap again and it went pretty well. Until he decided it was time (at 2 o'clock mind you) to wake up his partner in crime-Joshua. Usually, the kids sleep until 3. Today, they were all awake at 2:00. It was an early pick up day, so it actually worked out just fine. Parents were here by 3 so I would have enough time to drop off my kiddos and head to my ultrasound appointment. Donovan's mom watched both kids for us. Donovan was out of town on a college tour with kids from the Boys and Girls Club, so he was trying to make it home before the appointment.

Unfortunately, he didn't make it! But the ultrasound technician made a DVD for free for us! She was very nice. I made sure to tell her ahead of time that we didn't want to find out if we were having a boy or girl, so she made me look away when measuring the leg bones. I almost looked once, but controlled myself and looked away so fast! It was so reassuring to see baby Pax and know he/she was okay. The technician said the baby was perfect :) Donovan made it the minute my ultrasound was over :(

I went home and picked up the kiddos. I made tater tot casserole for dinner. We love it! We just relaxed the rest of the night. I bathed the kids and put them both to bed because Donovan was at an all boys overnighter for the B&GC. After the kids were out, I snuggled into bed with the ipad and watched "The Diary of Anne Frank" and ate a mint chocolate chip klondike bar.

A Day in the Life-Wednesday

2011-07-07T07:42:00.003-05:00

I started the day early. A little too early-3:30a.m. I woke up with a terrible stomach ache. I tried to sleep it off and ignore it, but ended up trying to take some Pepto Bismol. This did not help! Right when I thought it helped, I began throwing up :( After throwing up-I felt so much better! I was able to wash up and fall right back to sleep. I woke up at 7 am to my alarm and was queasy until lunch time.

I got ready for the day and went into the living room. I usually have daycare kiddos start showing up by 7:15, but today was another morning where they didn't show until 8:30 or so. So I watched the Today Show until Halynd woke up and wanted a drink and something to eat.

After all the kiddos arrived, we ate breakfast, Oatmeal Pancakes and blueberries, cleaned up and played for a little bit in the house while I straightened up the livingroom and made my bed. By then, it was time to go outside for a bit. Victoria, Donovan's sister came over for a little bit and played with the kids. They love her and call her "Teeto". She's awesome with them. She left a little before lunch time.

While the kids colored their lesson, I made sandwiches for lunch with yogurt, blueberries and strawberries. They love yogurt! We cleaned up from lunch, went potty and washed our hands. Ready for a nap, they laid down for the story. I have noticed that with Malachi getting older, he sleeps until around 9 each morning. If he does this and takes a nap-that boy will NOT go to sleep earlier than 11 pm. Even if he has been laying in bed for 2 straight hours. No matter how many stories he is told. SO, I did an experiment-he did not take a nap! And he was asleep last night by 9! I think we will just do naps when he is extremely tired from now on. He just sat up and played with his superheros and blocks while the other kids were napping.

When the kids woke up, they had their yummy snack of goldfish. Malachi and Halynd went with Donovan's dad when he got off of work! They asked and he was excited to take them :) Donovan made it home around 3:30 and just rested until the daycare kiddos went home.

Our Jeep is officially dead for now. It needs a new Head Gasket and a new Radiator. So! Until we can get those parts and fix it, we have a permanent driveway decoration. I am really excited about our new budget because not only are we able to give more, but we are able to pay off debt and save each month. This means that the Jeep will be fixed soon! Some awesome friends stopped by and offered us to borrow their car for a couple days. With me having the sonogram, and Donovan going out of town for work today and not making it into town until the time my appointment starts, we were wondering how to work out transportation! But we have great friends and they made that situation easy to figure out :) Thanks John and Angela!

We ran a few errands (Went to Walmart...) and headed over to Donovan's parents house for dinner. They grilled burgers out and invited us! They were delicious. Even had my favorite-salt & vinegar chips! Halynd ate a bowl of beans. She was even offered this bowl of chocolate peanut butter icecream, but wanted beans instead!

We went home after dinner and got the kids ready for bed. They were sweaty and stinky, so a bath was very good for them!

Donovan ready them their story of choice, "The Jungle Book". He tucked Haly into bed and I tucked Chi into bed. They were both out before 9, so Donovan and I watched "America's Got Talent" and then hit the hay!

A Day in the Life-Tuesday

2011-07-06T11:13:00.003-05:00

Tuesday-Back to work. Donovan was up and out of the house by the time I was waking up. He had to be at work by 7:30. I got out of bed at 7 and changed into some comfortable clothes. I had time to brush my teeth and hair before Haly got up at 7:15. Chi rolled out of bed at 8 and wanted some milk and cereal. I didn't have any daycare kiddos arrive until 9, so we just ate breakfast and chilled until then. Franklin and Dinosaur Train was our entertainment :)

While they were watching some toons, I worked out our new budget. Since Donovan just started a new job and there have been a few arrangements with my daycare, I had to rework our budget. I like having everything written down on paper. For some reason, knowing where every penny is assures me! I also made a list of what items we still need to purchase for Ms. Halynd's 2nd birthday at Chuck E. Cheese's this weekend. We had Chi's 2nd there and he loved it. We loved not having a cleanup! And Ms. Ball O'Energy is pretty excited about getting to play all the games, eat cake and play with her friends! I started a load of laundry and put away a load just in time.

After the kiddos all arrived, we worked on an alphabet lesson. I am a proud Momma-Chi can sing his ABC's and is working very hard on writing his whole name. He gets a little frustrated that his lines aren't perfectly straight. I don't know if he gets that from his Daddy or what...I'm not that obsessive ;) Chi is very artistic and is great at coloring realistically and in the lines. He loves to paint, draw and write. Halynd surprises me with her ability to sit for 5 minutes and color a picture. She is no where near coloring in the lines as of yet, but she does change colors and take her time "finishing" her picture.

We cleaned up, had a potty break and went out back to play. We opened up the play tunnels and enjoyed the comfy grass underneath! I am not sure if Bug chasing the cat through the tunnel or watching the kids crawling through the tunnel a hundred times was more enjoyable. They played a little baseball, dug in the dirt and attempted to scrape what sand is left in the sandbox (I told them not to dump it all over the yard, but alas, hardly any sand!).

Lunch time was much anticipated. I fixed up a spaghetti-ish Lasagna dish that I created. The kids love anything with pasta, cheese and sauce, so it was a winner! They love corn, grapes and bread and butter, too-so they were very happy with lunch.

Next on the schedule is naptime. We usually have lunch around 12:30 and try to be cleaned up and laid down-ready for a story-by 1:00. They are napping from 1-3 right now and that seems to work for everyone. This particular day, Donovan's parents came to pick up Chi after lunch. He was VERY excited about going with them. They went to the lake and swam for a couple hours. He ended up staying with them all day and didn't come home until after 10! He was exhausted but loved every minute with them. They are fantastic grandparents and treat Malachi and Halynd like a little prince and princess. They are a little spoiled, but that's what grandparents are for, right? ;)

After they woke up from their nap-at precisely 3-they enjoyed some goldfish and juice. Then they played in Malachi and Halynd's room for a little bit. They were very occupied with the giant blocks-building towers, carports and robots. We cleaned up and got ready for parents to come. All the kiddos were picked up by 5:15.

Donovan came home at 4ish and just relaxed for a little bit. He has been experiencing some kidney pain, so he's been trying to take it easy. We ate a simple dinner of leftover spaghetti and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I was supposed to bake a German Chocolate birthday cake for Donovan's brother, Davis, last week...but time got away from us! So, I mixed up the ingredients and we turned on some Owl City and cxvi and rocked out a bit while we licked the beaters. We took the finished cake to Donovan's brother and he was very happy.

We ran a few errands at Walmart, the bank and Academy Sports. Donovan's bike is being repaired at Academy and we were just checking on it. By this time, we were sure Chi was ready to come home, but he was not. We took Haly home and got her bathed and in her Jammies. She's been fighting some bug, so has been extra cranky and tired. Poor girl :( We tried to lay her down to sleep, but she was hysterical. She laid on Donovan's chest while we watched "America's Got Talent" and fell fast asleep.

We waited until Chi came home and got him ready for bed and settled for the night. He was very tired and crashed out pretty easy. After that-we hit the hay too!

19 Weeks

2011-07-05T09:58:00.002-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights

How far along: 19 weeks.

Size of Baby: An Hierloom Tomato! About 6.0 inches long and 8.5 ounces.

Maternity Clothes: Shorts are getting a littttle tight around the waste :) I have been wearing a lot of work out shorts and shorts with a stretchy waste band. Regular shirts-as long as they are a bit longer.

Gender: It's a surprise! It's going to be hard not to find out on Thursday!

Movements: I can feel baby Pax moving all the time now! Multiple movements a day :) I was starting to worry...

Sleeping: So strange-I'm tired, yet have a hard time winding down. It feels like my eyes just want to stay open, but all I want to do is lay there :)

What I miss: It's getting hard to sleep on my belly-which is most comfortable to me!

Cravings: Still getting satisfaction on anything salt and vinegary, but trying very hard to eat healthy!

Symptoms: Feeling that ligament stretch in my lower abdomen and hip area. My belly button is already coming out!

Due Date: November 28, 2011

Next Doctor Appointment: Thursday, July 7, 2011 (1st sonogram)

A Day in the Life- Monday

2011-07-05T09:14:00.005-05:00

Well, Donovan woke up early and headed out to meet a friend (John) to attempt fixing the Jeep. He ended up being gone from 9am-4pm with no luck. As it turns out-there is more than a quick fix problem going on. The radiator has a crack in it and the head gasket may be blown. So, we are down to one vehicle. This doesn't really affect us for the most part right now. We only have four people in our little family, so Donovan's 4 seat Jeep is just fine....until November :) I run a daycare, so the only times I have to use my car is in the event I have to go to the store or run an errand. This, of course, means that Donovan is already home. I am pretty confident we can make it work for now and slowly work on replacing the parts that are damaged. Good thing we have a couple friends who have amazing skillz when it comes to mechanics!

The kids and I woke up at 9. (Halynd had been up with Donovan for a little while, so she was already set with a drink and a snack watching Tangled) At their request, we ate some oatmeal and yogurt. Halynd is THE messiest eater I've ever seen. I want to take the fork from her and feed her myself so she doesn't make a disaster area while she's eating, but I indulge her-in hopes that she will learn appropriate table manners.

We basically stayed in the house all morning. It was pouring outside. The kids colored and drew random pictures. Malachi practiced writing his name. While I was doing the dishes, my darling daughter decided to tattoo her legs and palms. She used a mysteriously appearing pen and a blue highlighter. She is quite the artist and draws straight lines well. Especially in adornment of her thigh area. She managed to strip her clothes off while she was doing it, so for the that I was pretty thankful. She had a little bug last week which resulted in very loose pottying. So, after 11 nasty accidents-which involved cleaning the carpets and multiple baths for her-I decided to diaper her.

I turned on Gnomeo and Juliet for the kiddos, got them set up with a snack and a drink and set out to clean up the house. I managed to clean both kiddos rooms, both bathrooms, our bedroom, the kitchen and the living room all while the kids were watching the movie. I was excited to mop the entire house all at the same time without having to wait a couple hours in between. I also managed to clean the carpet cleaner, make a few phone calls and vacuum.

After this, I was beat and we were hungry! I fixed the kids their favorite-Peanut butter & Jelly with some fruit and yogurt. I made myself some dry ramen. (It's delicious!). After lunch, we cleaned up and I laid down the kids for a nap. Halynd slept from 1-2:15 and Chi fell asleep right before Haly woke up.

We read a thousand books (not really, but it felt like it) and played babies in Haly's room while Chi was snoozing. He managed to sleep until after Donovan got home at 4:30ish. He's always been a great napper! Halynd, however, is hit or miss with naptimes. She is a sensitive sleeper and is awakened easily. Chi sleeps through me vaccuuming, kids running around and the loudest of noises. Hopefully she'll work up to that ;)

When Donovan got home, we got ready and ran to Walmart to get a couple groceries. We swung by Eureka Pizza to grab one of their $3.99 deals for dinner. It was delicious! By the time we ate and cleaned up, it was time to head out for fireworks! We picked up a couple more pizza's for Donovan's family and made our way to Arvest Ballpark. We parked along side of the road and watched a great show. We weren't sure how Haly would handle it because she is terrified of the fireworks that have been going off in the neighborhood. She is convinced that they are dragons and that they are coming for her. We have no idea where she has thought of this, but she is actually quite scared. She saw the fireworks and realized that they were just pretty lights in the sky and not fighting dragons.

We ended our night pretty tired. After reading "Green Eggs & Ham" two times, Haly decided to read it herself. She fell asleep with the book on her face.

A day in the life: Sunday-Day 1

2011-07-04T09:40:00.002-05:00

Warning: Long post with no pictures! A glimpse into our fun life.

Sunday mornings are great! We get to sleep in until at least 8. Haly got up at 7:30, however and was content to watch cartoons with a cup and cereal while I took a shower. She had a mysterious red patchy rash on her face-she usually gets this when she has ketchup, mustard, ranch, bbq sauce or condiments. So I gave her a little benedryl and Tylenol.
Malachi snoozed until 9 and woke up just in time to get dressed for church. I had laid out his outfit on his bed for him, but he is in a stage where he just likes to pick out his own clothes. He's pretty good about matching, although sometimes I cringe and just let him wear what he wants :) He's obsessed with a certain pair of Spider man water shoes, so that is the only pair he is wearing right now.
I saved Halynd to get dressed for last. She has a way of getting messing even when there really isn't anything to get dirty with. She wore her ladybug top with a pair of jean capris and a pair of cute jelly sandals. I'm growing out her bangs, so her hair was sticking up!
We left early, 9:10, so we could get gas and make it to McDonald's. I've realized lately that I don't really hang out with the kiddos with just me and them to go do fun, memorable things. We went inside to eat after I debated whether to eat in the car or inside the entire drive there. They both wanted parfaits with milk and I grabbed a sausage biscuit with some water. Parfait with Halynd=fail! By the time we left she had managed to get yogurt in her hair, on her dress and all over her hands. We cleaned up and washed our hands and were off to church by 9:40.
Upon arriving to church, I called Donovan so he could help me with the kiddos, and good thing I did because I realized our jeep was smoking under the hood and there was brown foam coming from the bottom~He looked at it briefly and helped me inside with the kids.
After dropping them off in Children's Church....with a little reluctance from Halynd, I sat in on the service. Donovan preached on a new perspective with the Prodigal son. He did a really great job and God really spoke through him. After church was over, we loaded up and headed to the car store-Auto Zone. Donovan went inside with Chi and bought Antifreeze Coolant and a new cap for the radiator resivour while Halynd snoozed in her carseat and I listened to some Owl City.
After making it home, we changed and went over to Donovan's parents house for some lunch. We could definitely get used to having meals made for us :) We had a full belly and came home to crash for a little bit. Malachi wanted to stay with Donovan's parents, so he helped wash the dog and just hung out there while we took a little (2hour) nap.
After said nap, we dropped Halynd off at Donovan's parents house to head to a BBQ at some good friends' house, the Rodriguez's. We had a great time just hanging out and eating burgers-delicious milky way cake-and virgin margaritas :) They had some fireworks and were like middle school boys all giddy while they were shooting them off. We headed home around 10, but didn't get very far. We managed to get about 5 miles away from their house when our check engine light was flashing and there was smoke coming out from the hood again. We pulled into a Walmart and Donovan grabbed some more supplies in hopes of just getting our Liberty home :( No such luck. At 10:40, we called for Donovan's parents and they came to get us. We left the Jeep in a restaurant parking lot. We went by Donovan's parents house and grabbed the kiddos. It was 11:40 by the time we got home and were exhausted. We laid the kids down and just sat up talking until almost 1.
That wraps up our hectic Sunday! I will be taking pictures from now on :)
I'm 19 weeks today :)

A Week in the Life.

2011-07-01T09:29:00.003-05:00

I really like the idea from Kelly's Korner! She is taking a week to post every evening how her day went raising two little girls. I am going to do this starting Monday morning! It will be interesting to see how the day is managed between being pregnant, having two little ones, watching 4-6 little ones, hanging out with the hubby, doing chores, playing...

So, starting Monday, it will be: A Week in the Life!

18 weeks

2011-06-27T15:10:00.006-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along: 18 weeks

Size of baby: About the size of a sweet potato. About 5.6 inches and about 6.7 ounces.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: Gained 10 lbs.

Maternity Clothes: I wear a couple pairs of maternity shorts, but pretty much any regular stretchy shirt or t-shirt. I got an awesome pair of maternity capris at Old Navy :)

Gender: It's a surprise!! But I have had a couple dreams that it's a girl ;)

Movement: Not feeling very much movement yet. Have felt sparing popping.

Sleep: So tired!

What I miss: Watermelon, Cantaloupe, Avocados...weird what pregnancy does!!

Cravings: Mainly just salt and vinegar chips :) But I saw a study on the Today Show that said women should stay away from bad potatoes such as chips and fries because that's what makes you gain weight later in life!

Symptoms: A lot of discomfort on my tail bone when I stand up from sitting or from laying on my back. Think it's about time to only side sleep.

Due Date: November 28, 2011

Next Doctor Appointment: Sonogram-July 7th, 2011 at 4pm.

17 (and a half) weeks and Hardcore Potty Training

2011-06-24T11:24:00.003-05:00

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along: 17 weeks (5 days)

Size of baby: About the size of an onion. About 5.1 inches long and 5.9 ounces.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: Gained 9 lbs.

Maternity Clothes: I wear a couple pairs of maternity shorts, but pretty much any regular stretchy shirt or t-shirt. I got an awesome pair of maternity capris at Old Navy :)

Gender: It's a surprise!!

Movement: Felt some kicking or repositioning this morning as I was waking up.

Sleep: Sleeping pretty well so far. Just very tired. All the time!

What I miss: Watermelon, Cantaloupe, Avacados...weird what pregnancy does!!

Cravings: Still stuck on the sweet and salty kick. Slowing my orange intake and drinking orange juice sparingly :) Salt and vinegar chips.

Symptoms: At a point where I'm not feeling very pregnant. Other than being very tired, I've noticed a little uncomfortableness when I have to bend straight down.

Due Date: November 28, 2011

Next Doctor Appointment: Sonogram-July 7th, 2011 at 4pm.

Potty Training (Mommy)

I can't believe.

This little stinker.

She has been potty training since she was 18 months old. At first, she did amazing! She would go 4 hours at a time without having to even go potty! Then, this headstrong little monkey decided she would rebel! She does not like the fact that I "make" her sit on the potty when it's not her idea! She will gladly go when it is her idea, but I cannot tell her when she should go. In this event, she will pee numerous times in her pants! Well, fastforward 6 months. We are at it again. And I'm not giving up this time! I am talking hardcore, not even carrying diapers in the diaperbag. We are mostly at home during the day, so that's no big deal. It's the public we will work on! We will be doing a lot of sundresses with no underwear and a lot of shirts with just underwear. Here's to round 3! She is a stubborn little thing, but the most adorable little girl I've ever laid eyes on!

16 Weeks

2011-06-13T12:58:00.001-05:00

16 Weeks.

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along: 16 Weeks

Size of baby: About the size of an avocado. 3.5 ounces.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: Gained 7 pounds.

Maternity Clothes: I wear a couple pairs of maternity shorts, but pretty much any regular stretchy shirt or t-shirt.

Gender: It's a surprise!!

Movement: No movement yet. Just a rock hard feeling when my bladder is full :)

Sleep: Sleeping pretty well so far. Just very tired. All the time!

What I miss: Hmm- Soda :) (even though I never really drank much anyways)

Cravings: I've had so many strange cravings! My weirdest: Bologna and mayonnaise sandwich with pickles and regular chips on top. Pickles, anything with vinegar, fruit (oranges), carrots. Just a hankering for salty and sweet I think!

Symptoms: I've been feeling some ligament pain the past couple of days. I have BAD allergies. Bad. And I'm starting to show :)

Due Date: November 28, 2011

Next Doctor Appointment: July 7th, 2011 at 4pm.

No Justice

2011-05-28T21:55:00.001-05:00

I have had the indescribable opportunity to see unbelievable destruction. I have had the incredible pleasure of serving people who have lost everything. I could not even begin to realize what devastation took place until I had the chance to serve the people of Joplin.

There are those whose homes were left unscathed by the F5 tornado that touched down in Joplin almost a week ago. The reported 200 mph winds ripped bark off of trees, moved entire homes off of their foundations into the front yard, crumpled whole cars and trucks into unrecognizable balls of metal and completely demolished over 2,000 homes, schools and businesses. It is unfathomable that only 156(ish) people died. Although, there are still over 105 people missing and unaccounted for, it's hard to even imagine how anyone survived this.

The news does this disaster NO justice. I watched the news reporting early Monday morning, first thing, on the local 4029. As well, the Today show had a 15 minute special to start off their show Monday morning. I could not wrap my mind around the devastation surrounding the news reporters. The images flashing across the screen of them standing in front of a deserted, completely lost hospital still could not even entertain my mind of what is really there.

Canvasing the streets today with Metro Church was an amazing blessing. We were able to walk up and down the most devastating parts referred to as "Ground Zero", clip board in hand, work gloves shoved neatly in our back pockets-and knock on houses (that had doors). Generally, we would walk up to a few people standing on foundation where a house should've been, or them sorting through random belongings. We were able to look them in the eye and offer them physical needs such as fresh, clean bottled water, sanitary and toiletry needs, medicine, non perishable foods, clothes, diapers, wipes, medicine. We were able to tell them there was a place (Grace Baptist Church) just down the street with hot meals, drinks and rooms full of clothing for them. We were able to show them the love of Christ through actually taking to time to care about them and their physical well being.

Coming home was something surreal. I imagined my home looking like the war like scenes in the streets of Joplin. I imagined my clothing blown 3 blocks down, my walls completely gone, my memories and keepsakes ruined by rain and ravaged by wind. I imagined how I would feel if I were completely at a loss like the people we met in Joplin. Instead, I'm sitting in the air conditioning-not like the smoggy, humid atmosphere of Joplin where there is no electricity or clean drinking water. Instead, I am working on my computer. Instead, I am sitting in a perfectly put together, comfortable home. I can only imagine what the people feel like in that city. Even after seeing what I've seen and experiencing what I have-I know that I could never feel the full awareness of what the people of Joplin are feeling.

As the news keeps exposing stories of amazing survival, or unfortunate death-I still cannot wrap my mind around the fact that this has even happened. Please keep praying for the people of Joplin. Please pray also for all the people who have the heart and spirit of Jesus to do His work and take care of his people. Please also pray that we continue to sacrifice and love on these people to show them that there really is hope. That there really are people who just want to help. That there are people who really do care.

Spring Puddles

2011-05-11T10:31:00.000-05:00

I was always the kid who loved some warm spring rain. I couldn't wait to go outside barefoot and run through the puddles. There's something about running crazily through muddy, dirty water while rain is pouring over you that gives a child [and sometimes adult] a sense of joy.

Malachi usually flips out when he is wet-from drool, food, drink, accident...He does NOT like being wet. It was strange on this day. He was already hyped up about watching daddy play softball, so I think carefree attitude stemmed from that. He was soaked from shoulder to toe by the time we left the ball field. Caked in mud. Covered in sand. Drenched in water. And he loved it.

SAHM

2011-04-21T09:23:00.000-05:00

A title I thought would never happen.

Well, I have officially been involved with daycare since Malachi was 18 months old. He's now 3 1/2. In that time, I have had another little one and have another one on the way. It was a long process, but I have been doing daycare at my own home for a year and a half. I honestly never thought we would ever be in the position for me to be able to stay at home. With doing daycare, it works out great financially. The greatest benefit is getting to spend the entire day with my kids. The days are long right now, but they won't always be. This is a chance of a lifetime that I need not take for granted.

Eventually, *sniff sniff* Malachi will go to Kindergarten and just 2 short years later, Halynd will go to Kindergarten. They will no longer be spending the entire day with me!

There are many benefits of doing daycare at my home. I am able to see my children all day and care for them. I am able to teach them new things. I am able to love on them and cuddle with them. We have a very flexible schedule that caters to bad moods and missing naps. We can do many fun activities inside and out. My kids get many great friends that they love seeing everyday. Malachi even cries when they leave.

With everything, there are a couple drawbacks. The hours are LONG. It seems longer with two young ones. Being a mommy is a 24.7 blessing :) We are limited in where we can go because my car only holds three kiddos. I watch 6+2(of mine)=8 kids. So we have to get very creative with what we do! It is a wear on the walls. Really!

Our plan has always been that when our kids go into Kindergarten, I will go back to school to get my nursing license. This is our plan, but God always has a fun way of surprising us!

Metro Church

2011-03-31T22:49:00.001-05:00

So, this week for Kelly's Korner SUYL Friday-it's all about churches! I just want to take this opportunity to share about our amazing church community.

Metro Church has a great pastor, Andy Swart. He preaches a majority of the time. My husband, Donovan, preaches for Andy in his absence. I love the style of preaching. Straight from the Bible. There are no verses skipped over because they may be controversial or seem rash. I have learned SO much about God's word just by learning to read the Bible verse by verse. God's word is alive and reveals so many great aspects of Christ.

Another aspect of the Metro that I enjoy is the outreach to the community. There are strong members of leadership that are constantly and consistently searching for areas in the community that we can come together as a church and help. We have been taught to be humble servants to the community.

Having two children myself, I am very interested in the children's ministry. I love the lessons that are always well thought out on the level of my kiddos. The director couldn't know how much it means to the other parents that she cares so deeply for our children. She has five children, homeschools, has 2 toddlers and plans the lessons and crafts. She is amazing and has taught the children many wonderful important aspects of Christ that are longlasting and impacting the children spiritually.

If you are in the Rogers/Bentonville/Fayetteville/Springdale/Bella Vista or surrounding areas, Metro is very worth checking out! There are individuals from all cities surrounding Rogers, although that is where we are located.

Spring fever...or early nesting?

2011-03-29T09:15:00.000-05:00

I am barely pregnant, 5 weeks 2 days to be exact, and the excitement has not worn off. This has made me realize that there is another being coming into this home in 8 months. Although it seems like November is very far away, I'm sure the time will pass quickly and I'll wonder where to time went...and what I did with it.

Being a rainy day outside, this gave me time while the kids were playing in Malachi's room to make a list of "Spring Cleaning". We have so many things that we don't even use! I am planning on gutting out this house and leaving only the things that we use or need!

My list so far:

Kitchen

Reorganize pantry
Reorganize cabinets (Get together a goodwill pile of dishes, cups & bakeware I don't use)
Put away and sterilize bottles (planning on nursing as long as possible!)
Clean off refrigerator
Polish all stainless steel (Yuck!)

Living room

Organize desk to stay clean!
Dust and Pledge all shelves, tables, Mantel.
Clean windows inside and out.
Clean under couches (I'm positive there are many missing hotwheels under there)

So, that should keep me busy for a while, since I plan on doing these things mainly on Saturdays and Sundays. Among these things, making some artwork for above our couch and bed are on my list as well as printing out pictures of our family to hang up in the hallway! My walls are bare and I can barely stand it!

Third time's the charmer.

2011-03-23T11:07:00.001-05:00

Well, we're settling back into our routine back at home. We got some exciting news yesterday and I wanted to share.

Come December, we will have three little Golden babies 4 and under in this house! God, help us! We are very excited and feel very blessed. My first Dr. appointment is in the morning bright and early, so we'll know more after that! We feel like this is our first baby again.

So, the only question is...Will we have another one of these....

Or another one of these....

? We're waiting until December to find out! There are few surprises in life, why not enjoy this one...one last time?

Random A-Z

2011-03-22T13:05:00.001-05:00

I have seen quite a few bloggers posting a random a-z list. This seems like a fun idea to me! So, here it is:

A. Age: 24
B. Bed size: queen.
C. Chore you dislike: I LOATHE putting away laundry. Separating=no prob. Washing=no prob. Folding=no prob.
D. Dogs: Bug (Boston Terrier/Pug mix-3 years old), Romo (Boxer/Beagle mix-1 year)
E. Essential start to your day: There's just something about the Today show that I love!
F. Favorite color: green
G. Gold or silver: silver.
H. Height: 5'3"
I. Instruments you play(ed): Does the recorder in the 3rd grade count?
J. Job title: full-time daycare owner at home and momma. (Bill organizer, chef, maid, yah know..)
K. Kids: two little stinkers, Malachi-3, Halynd-20 months.
L. Live: northwest arkansas
M. Mom’s name: Sue
N. Nicknames: Meg, Moo, (some even get so creative to call me- "Megamoo".
O. Overnight hospital stays: Tonsils and adenoids out when I was 9, Two births.
P. Pet peeves: Smacking gum! Using the correct forms of your, you're and their, there and they're! (Ha!)
Q. Quote from a movie: "Momma always said life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get". Forrest Gump.
R. Righty or lefty: righty
S. Siblings: one bro, one sis. (2 bro in loves, and 1 sis in love :)
T. Time you wake up: 6:15 am.
U. Underwear: ? Weird question...Op
V. Vegetables you don’t like: Brussel sprouts, asparagus, raw mushrooms, beets eww...
W.What makes you run late: Well, it's usually me grabbing all the last minute things that I think we'll need while we're out!
X. X-rays you’ve had: I had some kidney stones in the 9th grade, also cut my toe off when I was 9!
Y. Yummy food you make: Sweet and Sour chicken and Chicken spaghetti bake.
Z. Zoo animal favorites: I love seeing the cheetahs and monkeys-especially when the monkeys are playing.

We just got back from vacation. I am buried in a few piles of stuff, but will post some pics whenever I am finished putting it all away! :)

A Time for Everything.

2011-03-08T22:15:00.000-06:00

Ecclesiastes 3:6-8

a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
I am learning more everyday what these passages convey. There is a time for everything! Specificallly, right now-I am working on the "a time to be silent and a time to speak". I feel God has been speaking to me a ton lately about speaking wisely. Everything that comes out of my mouth is an image of Christ in my life. The more I speak foolishly or out of place, this really shows that I am being bullheaded and not listening to the prompting of God.
Every opinion I have, or thought that runs through my mind does not need to be shared. Especially if the thought is contrary to an individual's opinion. I'm talking about times where conflict can be easily avoided when someone is sharing their ideas on a subject and I totally shoot them down. This is not uplifting for anyone. I am left looking like a fool, wounded my friend and damaged the image of Christ in the process. I do this FAR too often and am working on changing.
I am working on being a good friend to those around me. It is important to me to have a true friend that will listen, be open, honest and willing to go deep. In my mind, I should probably think upon those things I seek out in friendship and be willing to be open as well!
I want to honestly be a good friend. To search but know when to give up. Know when to cultivate and the time to move on. Know when shedding tears is worth the vulnerability. I want to know when silence is better comfort than speaking. Know when to show my love or distaste. Know when something is worth waring over and fighting for to gain peace.
I feel like this will only come when I am listening to God speak into my life. It's only taken 24 years for God to gain my attention.

A secret to grocery shopping

2011-02-22T13:51:00.000-06:00

Many ask me how I get by with not breaking the bank when I go grocery shopping each week. There is a little secret, well at least my secret! I simply sit down at the beginning of each week-usually Saturday or Sunday afternoons-and glance over my 4 week rotation menu. I make a list in each category of what I need to buy. For example, Dairy, Meats, Canned, Fruits/Veggies, Misc. With breakfast and lunch, we have a very strict schedule of what we eat, so we know exactly what to buy and how much of it. As far as dinner goes, I sit down and write out what I will make for each night with the inclusion of an eating out night (Usually Friday or Saturday) and small group (we eat dinner there).

There are thousands of recipes to choose from that are simple and taste great on Kraftfoods.com or Allrecipes.com. There are certain foods that we don't like, fish, seafood, liver...so I don't ever include a recipe that has any relation to those foods :) But there are a ton of recipes that are usable on a every other week basis-Baked spaghetti, poppyseed chicken, homemade pizza, stir fry, etc. I keep a black index card box with a ton of recipes that are tried and true & easy that I can pick easily from.

Since I have the daycare, we are on a monthly food schedule that I've written out. There are weeks A-D. We stick to this and add in our dinner needs. This makes it extremely easy when it comes to knowing the cost week to week. We try very hard to stick to a $70/week budget. This is to include household items such as toilet paper, paper towels, dog/cat food, etc.

Another way we save a lot of money-about $30.00/week-is by going to Aldi's. No need to clip coupons-they don't take any! This is a grocery store that has everything Walmart does, just at extremely cheap prices. The only negative part of the experience is the selection of fresh fruits and vegetables. I do not recommend buying the majority of produce here. I usually stray from the fruits (especially bananas) and it's a hit or miss with vegetables. I just plan to buy my produce from Walmart or produce stands.

Well, there you have it! That is how we do groceries at the Goldens. I use "we" as a loose term. If I say "we", I really mean I'll be spending about $30 more at the store if the hubs goes :)

Change of Heart

2011-02-21T11:02:00.001-06:00

It is amazing what God uses to get to your heart. I had hit rock bottom for a while now. I was thirsting for something and didn't know what it was. I had a genuine desire for something more, but didn't know where from, who from, what from. I have searched and searched. I've looked in the church community and couldn't find what I needed. I've looked in more non personal ways such as blogs, advice columns, books-but still the desire burned. I even decided that it was something I needed from my husband, but was consistently disappointed and still left with this need.

I would make excuses to myself why I didn't do my consistent Bible study and quiet time. I'm too tired was the persistent answer that permeated and clouded my vision. I had been caught up in the everyday nonsense that felt like a weight on my shoulders. There is always laundry to be washed, folded and put away. There is an unmeasurable, unending amount of dishes-loading, unloading, loading. And the cleaning. I am convinced that cleaning will never end. Although all these other tasks were important, the responsibility of raising 2 kids and working (watching 6 others), going to school and church remained also. There are also the other 1,000 everyday things that serve as a distraction from what is really important. I had become consumed with these things and even though I was full of responsibilities and duties, I still wanted something more.

I am so excited to say that God has been working hard on my heart for a while now. I have been searching for the answer to my unending desire and realized that the answer has been literally right in front of my nose the whole entire time. Residing in me. Christ is enough. I never understood that statement. There was always those thoughts of but this and but what about that in the back of my mind.

I've also found a friendship that I believe is going to be the best one I've ever had. One that is authentic and genuine. One that is focused on uplifting and encouraging each other. One that is not centered on gossip.

Even on this rainy day, my vision is no longer cloudy. I have a sense of peace that I've been longing for for so long. Jesus is enough.

My Sweet Valentines

2011-02-14T13:58:00.000-06:00

I can't believe how much my little Valentines have grown this year!

Song of Solomon 2:16-"My lover is mine, and I am his!"

Aside from my two sweet little Valentines, my heart belongs to my husband this Valentines' Day. The Lord has blessed us this year. We have grown closely to Him and therefor, together.

Spring in January

2011-01-29T12:36:00.000-06:00

It is 66 degrees here in NWA and we are loving every minute! Malachi has short sleeves on with no coat! It feels SO nice. We decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather and go to the park! We were there for a record time of an hour and a half. It's so much fun now that Haly is big enough to play. She runs around, climbs on the jungle gym, slides down the slides and follows Chi everywhere! She learned something new today that made me so excited! She wanted to swing, so I put her on...and she pumps her legs back and forth! She actually has balance and doesn't fall backwards! It's amazing what they learn just from watching~ She has also learned to open doors! :(

Here's some pics of our fun day!

Haly Swinging!

Happy Birthday to my Mother in Law, Leah. She is a beautiful lady. She loves Jesus with all her heart and it shows in everything she does. Malachi and Halynd are in love with her and enjoy spending time with her so much! It is such a blessing that Donovan's parents and siblings moved up from Amarillo 7 months ago! It still feels like they are on a really long visit :) Love you and hope you have a very Happy Birthday!

18 months

2011-01-12T14:01:00.001-06:00

It's hard to believe that Halynd is 18 months old. She is still so little in my mind. Her body may be tiny, but her brain is growing! She is becoming so smart. Some stats about Hbug at 18 months:

Wears 12-18 month clothes still
Size 4 diaper-I am starting to think she's ready for potty training! I tried it last week and she told me whenever she was wet! After we did that for a day, she tries to take her diaper and pants off now when she's wet :)
Size 4-5 shoe
Has a handful of nicknames that she is often called: Halybug, Buggers, Hbug, Monkey, Haly B, HB.
She STILL weighs 19.6 lbs. The girl eats like she's starving, but doesn't gain weight very fast! She's in the 6th percentile for weight right now!
Still has 6 teeth on top and 4 on the bottom. Those teeth should be coming in any day now!
Says anything you ask her to. She talks in sentences now. A couple weeks ago on a trip to Walmart, she was in her carseat and was whining because she wanted her slippers off. We weren't sure why she was whining, though. As soon as she got her shoe off, she said, "I took it off Daddy!" and instantly was content. It was very sweet.
We did a trial run of "no binkie" and it went very well. She just started calling it "Ninny" a few days ago and has called her "blankie" by name for a couple months.
Got her first major owie last week. Her middle finger on her left hand was shut in our back door (not even all the way or very hard). It instantly turned black and was swollen. It's been a week, but her nail popped off this morning and she is feeling MUCH better about it.

Wednesday 1/5/11

This afternoon 1/12/11

Battled with Croup and won! She only had it for 2 days. (Thanks to some Prednizone)

LOVES Daddy. She always runs to him when he walks in the door from work.

Poor Mu Shu. Not really! He's all curled up sleeping while she pushes him around in her dolly stroller.

Loves to accessorize! She always brings me necklaces and bracelets to put on her.

Halynd,
You get more beautiful everyday. You are a feisty little girl, but are SO smart. We love who God created you to be. You bring such happiness and joy to Mommy and Daddy everyday. We're blessed to have you these past 18 months. You aren't a baby anymore and Mommy kind of likes having a little girl sidekick. You have such a sweet heart and we love you dearly!
Love you baby doll!
Mommy and Daddy

2011

2011-01-02T08:28:00.000-06:00

I realized yesterday that when I was younger, I viewed my life as a circle. January-December was my life in full circle.Everything started over on January 1. Now that I am older, I see everything in a linear fashion. I've been reading "New Year's Resolutions" all day. This has made me think tremendously about what I'd like to set as goals to accomplish this next twelve months. I honestly think most important only goal is to stop having unrealistic expectations in life. There are numerous, uncountable areas of my life where I am living in the clouds. I am expecting way too much from everything and any situation. When this happens, it is very difficult to swipe aside those expectations that cloud my sight. When this happens, little lies knit themselves into my daily life, causing me to struggle from disappointment. I don't want to live this way.
By dropping those expectations, I know I will leave room for whatever happens on a day to day basis. Life is not a movie, a certain book-or someone elses life. I just want to live my life-in my life!

A few other things I would like to accomplish:

To read through my entire Bible. Be in the Word daily. No matter how busy.
To be debt free (aside from student loans). I believe we can achieve that this year.
To stay organized and on top of my calendar.
Teach Chi to count to 20.
Teach Haly her ABC's.
To be content in the stage of life we are in.

I'm not really one about "resolutions" because they are so easily broken. But I think these are pretty realistic! If I don't accomplish all these things, that's okay too! There's always "next year" :)

I have these cuties to keep me accountable.

More than just a pretty face

2010-12-17T13:30:00.000-06:00

Chi and Haly are getting so big. I love when Haly brings me a baby and wants me to play with her. I love that Chi often goes in his room and gets specific toys and makes up an entire scene with them. I love when Haly draws back from a hug and pokes my eyes, nose, mouth and ears-telling me what each of them is in her little voice. (I's, noose, mowt, ers). I love when Chi wraps his arms around my neck and gives me a "big kiss" without me even asking for it. I love that every time the door opens during the day, they both run yelling, "daddy!"

So, the past couple of months have been trying. Doesn't it seem like every time you feel comfortable and have a groove, something throws you for a loop? I forget this happens often- far to easily. I have prayed about this much and come to the conclusion that nothing is ever going to just be. Our lives are constantly changing and evolving into what is from what it was. God doesn't want us to have a perfect life where nothing goes wrong. The reality of this life is that there are always things in our lives that are going to need fixing.

I know God allows obstacles in our lives to make us stronger. I am going to pray earnestly to not forget this and that I seek Him more-whether I am enduring a trial or just my everyday, mundane life! It's quite easy to look at a situation and become stuck in the middle of the mess. There is always a solution. Although, sometimes, the solutions are not what we have wanted.

So I'll sit back- not complacent with my life-but be content with what I have and continually excited about the future. I'm rolling along and taking what life has to give me. There are good gifts and bad gifts in life. I'm just going to take each one as it is, as it comes and continue through for the ultimate purpose. Jesus is alive and He wants to be famous.

Malachi

2010-12-04T14:46:00.000-06:00

My little guy is getting SO big.
He has beautiful hands (Just like his daddy).
He loves his "airplane hat" and will wear ONLY this particular hat in the cold.
He loves to dig in the dirt, collect rocks and would run around outside in his Buzz Lightyear underwear in 30 degree weather-if I didn't stop him.
He's very smart and loving. I love spending time with him. He has started to play independently. I can often stand outside his door without him knowing of my presence. He pretends all sorts of situations for Buzz Lightyear and Ironman to undergo. Just yesterday he rushed Ironman to the hospital because his arm fell off. He's starting to remember dreams and tell me about them. I love listening to his little voice. He brings such joy in my life.

Learning lessons from my Cutie Patooties

2010-11-28T21:31:00.000-06:00

While daddy was working on his Jeep this afternoon, Ms. Hbug and I took a walk around the neighborhood. I cannot believe she is already at the curious age where she wants to go everywhere and is so unaware that there are things that will hurt her. She is focused on looking at what's in the sky or across the street instead of what is directly in front of her. This reminds me of how God saves us. We are constantly focused on what is ahead of us. We look across the street & in the sky and are distracted so easily. We stumble over things & run through things. It's a good thing God can see what lies immediately in front of us. I'm sure he intervenes far more than we could ever imagine. I love this about God. He is constantly interacting with us in our lives. He doesn't just sit back in his easy chair with popcorn & some orange soda and watch us make mistakes. He is present. He is living in us and around us and through us.

I love that I have this picture of God through how I take care of my children. They are so involved in exploring and experiencing that they aren't aware of their ill welfare. I am the one who will grab their hands when a car comes driving down the street, interrupting their search for the perfect leaf. Looking back, I can see God lovingly grabbing my hand in many situations in life. I pray that I can learn to walk alongside of Christ. I pray I will mature in my faith enough to not always have God grabbing me by the hand, but beforehand, me looking up outside of myself and being aware. In the same manner as our children will learn to be aware of what is happening around them.

Christmas cards

2010-11-23T08:54:00.001-06:00

It's that time of year again when I am searching through all my photos from what's gone on in the past year. I'm hoping to find a decent picture to use for a Christmas card! I've found some really awesome ideas on the shutterfly website. These are some of my favorites:

Adorable Stationary Cards

I love this one because it has room for multiple pictures!

Cute party invites

I also found some good gift ideas. There are calendars and mugs and much more. What grandparent wouldn't love a calendar with all the grandkids filling up the months?
Mugs and Calendars

I love using shutterfly. They will even send cards to individual addresses if need be! We've used shutterfly for our engagement announcements, save the dates, past Christmas cards and birth announcements. There are always chances to earn free prints. They are already so cheap, too! The prints are always in great quality and very worth the money. It saves writing tons of holiday wishes in every card!

Look out for that Golden Christmas card for 2010 coming soon!

Holidays

2010-11-18T07:35:00.000-06:00

I'm putting together our holiday meal menu and shopping list this week. I would have put this information together sooner, had I realized that next week is already Thanksgiving! It seems the days are going by faster and faster. Days, weeks and months are flying by.
While putting together this list, I can't help to think about my family gatherings when I was younger. In looking at how much of the ingredients I need to feed everyone adequately, I imagine how hard it was for my families. My parents are divorced, and have been since I was in kindergarten. This means that we always had two big family gatherings. Two places to be at two different times during the day. Twice the amount of food to consume.
My mom's side of the family was huge! My nanny has 4 kids. Each of the kids have kids that equals out to 13. Now, each kid has kids-I can't imagine how the gathering would be now if it were still occurring. Times change. People move around and move on. There have been divorces, remarrying and reuniting. It's sad to say that now, the gathering will not ever take place again. It's good to remember that we can hold on to those precious memories of childhood. Although I do get sad when I think about the fact that we will never be all together again, I rejoice that I have positive memories to dwell on instead of negative ones!
My dad's side of the family is still all together. My grandma and grandpa have 3 kids. Each of my aunts and uncles have kids equaling out to 5. I have two kids~(My next oldest cousin is 13, besides my brother-21).
The fact that we aren't able to visit this year honestly tears me up. It's crazy how 1000 miles affects your life in a 1000 different ways. I miss my family greatly. At least I have those memories to cherish and the hopes to be able to visit sometime early next year.
I am looking forward to the fact that Donovan's family lives here now. We will not spend the holidays without family. We will be able to gather together and be thankful for the people who are in our lives and how God has blessed us. The Christmas tree is going up this weekend. The Christmas movies are beginning. Christmas songs are playing! I am looking forward to spending Thanksgiving and Christmas with my two little ones and awesome husband. I have everything to be thankful for. Sometimes it's hard to see through everything in order to get to that thankful place. Where I feel completely overwhealmed with all the goodness and love that surrounds me.

Ear piercing

2010-11-08T09:30:00.000-06:00

Halybug after the piercing

Donovan and I decided that we were going to wait until Halynd was 5 to get her ears pierced. We were going to make it a special day. Yesterday we were enjoying the nice weather and walking around the Promenade when we walked by Claire's. There was a little girl who was about 5 years old holding tightly to a teddy bear and waiting for her ears to be pierced. On a whim, Donovan says, "Let's get her ears pierced". I was in shock and a little nervous! We went inside and Haly was unsuspecting even when she saw the little girl wincing in pain from getting her ears pierced. We got her prepped and ready to go, picked out the earrings and went for it. We decided that if we were going to torture our princess that it would not be at different times, so both ears were done at once. There was a five second delay, but she screamed and cried for about 2 minutes afterwards-mostly because we had to clean them and then turn them. She was a champ and looks beautiful with her sparkly earrings.
On a sad note, she lost one while she was sleeping. I found it and had to repuncture the hole. That was more sad than when she had it done in the first place. Hopefully we don't have to revisit this! She needs to keep the earrings in for 8 weeks so that there's no infection, but after that, I forsee some fun trips for earrings in the future.
She looks so girly and pretty! I am so excited about it. Donovan said that Malachi is getting his first tattoo next week. Ha.ha.

Halloween Realizations

2010-11-01T08:55:00.000-05:00

My little lamb

Ladies and gentlemen, Buzz Lightyear was in the house!

Yesterday was Halloween! Beyond the obvious reasons of enjoying yesterday, i.e., trick or treating, dressing my children up in adorable costumes, consuming mass quantities of sugary treats :) There was reason for celebration beyond the enjoyment of all those things listed.

Yesterday was a celebration of Reformation day!

This is the first time it has been brought to my attention of this day. This dates back to the days of Martin Luther, (not to be confused with Martin Luther King, Jr.) I'm talking wayy back! October 31, 1517. Luther revolutionized religion. He brought light to the fact that the popular religions of the time were basing salvation on works. Now, up until yesterday, I misconstrued the passages on faith based on works. My understanding was that we MUST perform certain "things" to earn the grace and merit heaven. Now, I understand that because we are chosen to be saved, the fruit(not "s") of the spirit will be evident! I hadn't previously fully grasped the understanding of this statement. This is one example of what Luther fought for aside his other 94 reasons for straying away from religion and striving towards Jesus.

I am so busy with everything else in my life that I had given up on being "philosophical", but I am piecing together that anyone can grasp the intricate teachings of the Bible that aren't on the surface, but require searching the scriptures, praying often and keeping an open communication line with God and letting go to let the spirit manifest in my heart.

Halynd's Dedication

2010-10-11T10:43:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, October 10, 2010, Halynd was dedicated to being raised in the Lord. This is such a special day that will be marked and recorded forever for her to know. As parents, we want to do everything that is the best for our kiddos. We firmly believe that this commitment to raising Halynd to know that Jesus loves her is the most important aspect in her life. We want to always show our love for her. We want to explain to her that Jesus loves her even more than we do. Even though we would more than willingly die for our little girl, it is Jesus who hung heavily on that cross and died for her sins; for our sins. She has to know that no matter how much we love her and wish her everything noble, pure and true in life, what Jesus has is better. We could not have been blessed with a more beautiful little princess. It is our great pleasure to be ensured with the responsibility of raising her and keeping her healthy and safe on this earth. Thank goodness Jesus already knows Halynds heart.

This also marks her 15th month in our life! Her stats are:
Weight:19.6 lbs (Getting there!)
Wearing 12 month clothes, size 4 shoes & size 4 diapers.
She has developed quite a shoe fetish. She loves all types of shoes of every size. Her favorite thing to do during the day is wear everyone's shoes around the house (even if they are too big).
She has 4 teeth on top and 2 teeth on the bottom. She has been trying to get in all 4 canine teeth and all 4 molars this past month. It has been hectic trying to keep her rash free. We tried many options to relieve her pain from the teething rash-Aveeno rash cream, Bordeaux Butt Paste, yeast infection medication, Hydrocortizone, Balmex, Desitin, Desitin Maximum, corn starch and even olive oil, and many concoctions of mixtures of many creams and ointments! It seemed her rash would lessen in severity, but then flare back up again with a poopy diaper. It is heartbreaking to see the look in her eyes when she knows it's time for a diaper change :( We have gone through 6 types of diapers looking for a reaction (Cloth, Luvs, Huggies, Parent's Choice, Target brank and Kidgets from Dollar General), but the rash continued with vengeance. It's disheartening that we have had to stop cloth for the time being because of how much they cost and adding more diapers into the mix, but whatever helps relieve her pain is what we will do!
We took milk out of her diet, thinking it was a milk allergy, but the rash still remains. We are giving her Lactose Free.
We also took out juice for the time being, thinking that the acidity was irritating her rash. We replaced it with pedialyte because of the frequent loose stools she is having. We even decided to change wipes brand to the Target sensitive skin kind, because our friends say they are miracle wipes :) In all, we are going with the method of:
Parent's choice diapers
Target Sensitive Skin wipes
Eucerin Aquaphor Healing Balm (Which has helped tremendously)
Frequent, frequent diaper changes
Tylenol/Motrin rounds
Orajel. A lot of orajel.

Baby girl,
Mommy and Daddy love you unconditionally. No bout of screaming from teething or poopy diapers could ever mask over this joy we have that you are our daughter. So much more, Jesus loves you and died for you. He raised from the grave and went back up to heaven. He's coming one day, whether we're still alive here on earth or spending eternity with Him in heaven. We have committed our lives to show you the love Jesus has for you and the sacrifice He made. You are our beautiful princess and feel so, so blessed to be able to call you our daughter. Happy Dedication day, sweet girl! We are so happy we've had the past 15 months as your parents.
Love
Mama & Dada

It has been a trying few weeks in the Golden household, but we are getting there. Malachi has seemed to grow up a little bit in just this past month. He is sweet most of the time, with his occasional attitude poking through here and there. He is becoming very independent and will do things like: play with his toys of certain selection in his room for an hour or more, watch an entire movie, pick out a movie and turn it on for himself in his room, "read" books for extended periods of time, play with playdough or color, use the bathroom by himself and get his drink of choice out of the refrigerator to give to you. There has been a couple times where I have realized that Malachi was quiet for far too long, and much to my delight, he is doing one of the above listed activities and keeping himself out of trouble! I am still using caution, but am very excited to see him growing up a little more. His language has exploded and he has become a coherent chatterbox. My favorite saying of his is whenever anything breaks or is broken, "Mommy, Bob the Builder, we can fix it?" With an adorable look on his face with raised eyebrows and raised shoulders in a nonchalant manner.

Boogers can make you bleed

2010-09-30T16:05:00.001-05:00

Strange title for a post? I think not. Considering I was just doing my daily vacuum spree around the house-you know, the bedrooms; next onto the living room for the couch and the rug in there. There was, I kid you not, a dried booger on my couch cushion. Before I realized what it was, I did what you always do when there's a dried spot on the couch-use my fingernail to pick it off. Well, dried boogers are very sharp when they dry. Instantly my memory was jogged of the 12 running nostrils in the house when blood trickled from my middle finger.

I've been struggling with a few things for a while. I feel like I am constantly cleaning the entire time I am awake. I have attempted to make a schedule of chores that need to be done weekly/daily/every other dayish. This, you see, does. not. work. Not with multiple children under the age of 3 running around. I am not exaggerating when I say that I can meticulously clean the kitchen while they are eating breakfast, diligently have the dishwasher waiting for their dishes and meander into the living room and meticulously clean (I'm talking cheerios, apple jacks and captain crunch removed from under the couch type of clean). Only to find that the jovial chatter in the kitchen was actually the banging of yogurt covered spoons.

There are many instances where situations like this occur, quite frequently actually:
-You think your toddler is playing innocently with a walmart bag behind you as you talk to a bill company on the phone facing toward the computer. Nope, it's a bag of Easter grass that she has gleefully discovered. It's in the vacuum. It's in the couch cushions, under the couch cushions, in between the couch cushions. It's strewn throughout the living room. And later to be discovered in multiple places such as in her onezie.
-Your three year old is sitting at the table coloring so peacefully. You decide to check the mail. Come back in the door, sit down at the computer, open mailllll-HE'S OUTSIDE ON THE TRAMPOLINE!! He can now open the deadbolt. Joy.
-Last scenario (definately not last on the list, but last to list here)-Just when you think you can't handle anymore-you hear a loud crash in the kid's room. It's the entire 9 compartment toy bin organizer. On it's side. With two 2 year olds that are rather proud of themselves that they've accomplished such a feat. Of which they are now removing *(throwing) all the bins and their contents across the room so they can paddle their imaginary, "Row, row, row your boat". They missed the memo. This is NOT a boat. I cry.

I read a blog this morning that reminded me about something, of which reminded me about something else. :) (Love when that happens) The post was about how we shouldn't compare ourselves as mothers to other mothers. Sure, there is asking advice on how to potty train your child and tips on projectile vomiting, but we should never compare ourselves to one another!

Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that... Don't compare yourself with others. Galatians 6:4

I feel like I provide a loving, safe, nurturing learning environment for the kiddos I watch, as well as mine. Let's face it. I am a mother to more than just my children. Monday thru Friday, they are in my care from 7 am-6 pm. They see me 11 hours a day out of the 15 hours they are awake. I need to be a good example for them. I should be lovingly picking up toys and teaching them how to clean up when they are finished. Instead, of the late, I have often found myself begrudgingly putting away the pull behind dog for the 600th time, kicking cars that are scattered down the hallway in hopes they will go into Malachi's room and hotheadedly organizing the toys in the toy bin organizer (for the 600th time that day). I want my kids and the kids I watch to know I am filled with the spirit. Not the team spirit of "Yeah, let's clean this up, on 3!", but the spirit of Jesus. If I am not exuding the spirit to them, what example am I setting? It is a harsh reality when you realize you are being dumb and not following the examples Christ has clearly set for us to follow. At times I silently scream in my head, "PLEASE, fill me up. I can't take anymore. Not one more thing, Lord. I am tired. I am done. Done for the day. No more." And then I hear a crash. I am brought back to reality. Malachi has broken a bowl, but calmly rationalizes the situation with me, "Momma, it's brokeen. But Momma, Bob the builder, we can fix it? Yes, we can!". Pray for me that I can consistently remember that I am not alone, even when I am alone. The spirit is with me and knows what I need. Sometimes I get so caught up with myself and how I am "dying inside" and tired. That's what the spirit is for. He's there to fill you up. All you have to do is ask.

Malachi's 3rd Birthday!

2010-09-19T17:28:00.000-05:00

Three

Two

One

Newborn

I can't believe my baby is three. He had a "birthday weekend" since his birthday was on Saturday and his party on Sunday. We rented a bounce house and did a Toy Story theme, as per his request. He is tuckered out and enjoying the sweet gifts from his friends.

Three year Stats:
Weight-29.8 lbs
Height- 39 inches
Sleeping-STILL wakes up at least once a night.
Vocab-Says anything, has a slight impediment.
Likes-Cars, Trains, Planes, Dirt, being naked, peeing outside, watching movies with daddy and mommy, painting, matching games, counting, singing.
Dislikes-The word "No", spiders, snakes, streets, large crowds and sharing.

Malachi James,
You are and always be my sweet baby boy. It has been fun this year raising a two year old, but I'm sure we're both glad that the tough times of two are over. Now, it's on to three! You are learning and growing everyday and I love seeing you change before my eyes. You are very smart now and say everything that is on your mind. I'm so, so blessed you are my boy.
Love you so much,
Mommy

Church these days.

2010-09-13T10:42:00.000-05:00

As I sit and watch a video of a church choir recorded, I can’t help to think about my church home, The Metro. I see the children’s choir in the video is bigger in numbers than our church all together. This sheer difference in numbers makes me ponder about the body of our church.

Breaking free from the constraints of men is always difficult. People ask, “What is that church doing? Because they are clearly reaching people”. I have to sit back and think about this statement for quite a while. Coming to a conclusion is not easy to digest and is difficult to comprehend. There is no way I can know the hearts of the people attending “mega churches” (a church of 200 is mega compared to our community of 50 or so), but the result seems to lie somewhere within the message.

It seems there are so many that do not want to go to church for myriads of reasons. The top of the list seems to stay, “Church is full of hypocrites”. I have news for everyone who thinks this. Come closely to listen, because it may be quite shocking. You may want to be sitting down...WE ARE ALL HYPOCRITES. We are all sinners, living together on this earth, causing friction and dealing with the life we live. No one can be perfect, no matter what. I dislike greatly when people try to hold the pastor on a pedestal, as if they are incapable of sinning. We can only continually seek to make Jesus famous and glorify Him. There is no way on this earth that we will ever be fully satisfied by our pastor, our spouse, our children, our friends. There is always going to be a part of us that LONGS to be filled. We must always seek to be filled by the spirit and love of Christ. We go to church for one reason. To praise Jesus. To thank God for the sacrifice he made in giving His son. To pray the spirit fills our hearts and minds. There is a theme to this. It is NOT about us.

We do not go to church for us.

We do not go to church to have a fashion show of who has the best designer dress or the cutest children. We do not go to have a free babysitter for 2 hours while we “sit through” the service.

We do not go to find entertainment on a Saturday Night (Or Sunday morning).

We go to be filled with the spirit and to praise God. Whether this be through singing or by the message the preacher has to convey to us from God himself.

It seems that a vast majority of the “mega churches” are filled, filled to the brim with people who are constantly asking the question, “What can church do for me?” Instead of “What can I do for the Church?” And in CHURCH, I mean JESUS! So the preacher puts on a good show. The choir does a fantastic special. The offering is collected. People leave feeling warm and fuzzy. Good with their lives they are living and happy that they are healthy and wealthy. Not realizing we are dirty sinners who have been made clean ONLY by the blood of Jesus.

We are called to pour out our lives for Jesus-To follow Him and do His work here on earth. If that means serve somewhere in the community (church) we are involved in, then do it! Of course I’m not saying pour, pour, pour until we come crashing down out of exhaustion. I’m saying, pour! And be filled by the Spirit. Because that’s what He does. If we are going to use the Spirit-we may as well use Him for what He is made for.

Metro is a place where we are free from the constraints of fancy dresses and 3 piece suits. We are free from holding each other on a pedestal. We are free from Holy robes and Holy water.

We are free.

In Jesus.

Together in a community.

The best family I’ve ever had.

We hold each other accountable and hold each other in the light of the love of Jesus. We are all sinners. We will all make mistakes. But we are free in Christ. Now, if only there are others who are willing to break free of the constraints of man and ask what they can do for Jesus and not what Jesus can do for them.

Anniversary Getaway

2010-08-29T11:55:00.000-05:00

Last weekend, we were able to leave the kiddos with Donovan's parents and go to Silver Dollar City in Branson, Mo! We left early Saturday morning around 7 am while the kiddos were still snoozing and headed to the outlet malls. We couldn't check into the hotel until 3 pm, so we had to fill some time before the park opened at 10 am. After some successful shopping I joined the trend of "skinny jeans" at the request of my husband. He said he was going to pick out my clothes from now on. I guess I don't dress "hip or cool" enough for him :) I felt claustrophobic just putting the pants on. I can't imagine how it's going to be to actually wear them longer than 3 minutes. I just kept telling myself that I would get used to it. I remember trying on my first pair of flare jeans in the 6th grade. The way they didn't hug your ankles was strange, but I was determined to be just like all the other girls in 6th grade. So, now that the old look of skinny jeans is the new look, I am determined to give that a go. Only this time it's not because it's a fashion trend. It's because my husband said so. Haha.
We went to Silver Dollar City around 12 pm and stayed there until about 5 pm that evening. Its so funny how when you are away from your kids, all you do is think about what they are doing and if they are having fun or behaving. Every shop we looked in, I saw something that I just knew chi or haly would like. After leaving the park, we went to our hotel to check in. It.was.awesome! There was a jacuzzi in the room! We were able to take a much needed hour and half nap, but woke up in time to catch the Showboat at 8 pm for dinner. That was such a fun experience. We had Chicken Marcella and pot roast with mashed potatoes, steamed vegetables, salad and bread. Desert was extra scrumptious, raspberry cheesecake! After we ate, we were able to roam around the boat for about 30 minutes and see the view from the top floor. It was awesome to see how beautiful the water was with the moon light with the stars and the ships sailing by.

I was pretty much freaking out by this point. I had to psych myself up for the actual boat ride. I thought that we would go onto the boat to eat dinner and watch a show, but that it would be docked. Nope, the boat would be sailing it's big self through the vast waters of Beaver Lake while we carelessly ate dinner and laughed at the comedy routine. Meanwhile, down on the lake floor....who knows what's going on down there!!! If anyone knows me well, they know I am a waterphobic. Not all water, of course. Just the water that is hundreds of feet deep that you are floating on and can't see the bottom. No, not bathtub deep. Or even clear lake water deep. But, so deep that you start to tingle and feel a little woozy at the thought of sailing with a hundred people on a little boat that could capsize at any minute. I think the Titanic ruined me. I don't think I'll ever be able to go on a cruise. I just about lost it with a dinner show. In all, it was amazing, and I plan on doing it again some time soon. Maybe for a certain 5 year celebration :)
After the Showboat docked and the shock of the experience wore off, we went towards the hotel. Donovan realized that the trifecta of Hannah's Mirrors, Castle of Chaos and the Wax Museum was open until 12 am! We turned off and visited for a little while and met some pretty interesting people along the way.

We got back to the hotel and crashed. We woke up and had breakfast on the 9th floor. I have never been to a hotel where the food services were on any other floor but the lobby. The view was beautiful! After breakfast, we packed up and returned to the park for some more fun. We were able to visit the Marvel Cave. It was so much fun!
After the cave, we went on some more rides, but were so pooped from all the fun stuff we got to do in 2 days that we headed home early. It was a great trip and much needed time with the hubs. We were able to just chill together, have fun together and have lots of uninterrupted conversations. So blessed to be with this man I can call my husband. He is an awesome husband full of love, support and happiness. He leads our family, provides for our family and cherishes us with his actions. So thankful to celebrate 4 years with this guy. August 26, 2006.

Cyclical Breakdowns

2010-08-19T13:05:00.001-05:00

Do you ever have those days when you feel like you are vulnerable? Let me explain :) You know that you are loved and that your husband and children adore you. Heck, they may even appreciate you! :) But there's that taunting message that resonates in the back of your mind. "Maybe they don't love you as much as you love them. Maybe they don't really want to spend time with you. Maybe..." Usually, you are able to push that aside and with reaffirmation of that love, you continue on with your day. For me, it seems I am able to control that taunting voice that lingers, but every once in a while, I become vulnerable. I allow what others say to influence what I already know about my life and myself. I open my heart and mind to dwell on situations and subjects that I have already faced and placed neatly on a shelf in the back of my thoughts.
During the course of being married for four years, Donovan and I have been so busy trying to get our life set up. We have been going to school, working, going to and being involved in a church community and raising children. I've been a mother for three years (tear) and a working from home mother for a little over a year. Donovan has worked extremely hard to provide for us, take care of us and show his love for us. He is the most honest, loving person I know. At times we both get a little selfish of money, things or time spend with one another, but we always place each other first, no matter the situation. I feel we have done a great job with where our life is now and juggling how busy we are with everything. No matter how many times I cry to him about "stupid girl stuff", he always listens with a smug smile on his face (reminding me that I should really only cry to my sister about "stupid girl stuff"). He loves my oversensitive, overbearing, struggling to take charge and be in charge of my children self and calmly brings forth a situation (by the way, you can't control your children. Lesson learned there. If you think that it's possible, you will live disappointment over and over again.) He brings out a side in me that is so rational that I get on to him (showing how irrational I can be.) He brought to my attention recently that we are working very hard now for the future. That can really be applied to everything in our lives. Sometimes, with all the busyness and being apart from each other, it's easy to lose focus and forget the big picture. You don't just enter a marriage to be together all the time, forever. You enter a marriage and begin to make a life for yourselves. We are only four years into this and have already had amazing experiences that are unmatchable. I know we will experience greater things in the future, because-greater things are yet to come, greater things are still to be done. I find myself constantly getting caught up in my life and forgetting the bigger picture. We aren't here for ourselves. We are here to enjoy what blessings God has for us, but the big picture is-it's not about us. Our lives stand to glorify Christ. I need to keep focus of the task at hand and quit having these delusional cyclical (every couple months) break downs that beat me down and disallude me. My life is amazing. I have beautiful children, an adoring husband who tells me I'm beautiful (and really means it) and God provides for us in so many ways. What a blessing these four years of marriage have been.

A whole year with the little ladybug

2010-07-23T12:32:00.001-05:00

I know this is a little late, but we've been a little busy :)

July 10th, 2009 at 12:36 a.m. 6 lbs, 12 oz.

I cannot believe my little girl is already one! It seems like she's still just a baby, and she is my baby! Going through the parenting with Malachi, I didn't realize how much they really change. It seems like in just a few weeks, she exploded into a new person.
*She is 18.4 lbs. and 27.5 inches long.
*She has a head full of hair now that can be fashioned into rubber banded pigtails (horns). She will NOT keep bows in. She will eat them.
*She is walking all the time and everywhere.
*She is climbing on the couch, our bed, up stairs and any chair she can reach.
*She has 6 teeth, 2 bottom and 4 on top.
*She has kicked the bottle except for night time. Even then, sometimes she's so tired she just rolls over and goes to sleep. She's having a hard time drinking from a sippy cup because of how fast it comes out-she always spits it everywhere.
*She eats everything. I have not found a single food that she will not eat. I'm not really sure she has working taste buds. :) Her favorite foods are fruits and any pasta.
*She loves baby dolls.
*She loves her brother, mommy, daddy and bug.
*She just learned to pucker up while kissing and make kissy noises.
*She is mimicking anything we tell her, including shaking her head "NO", and smacking whatever it is she doesn't like away from her.
*We discovered she is a true water baby in every sort of the word. She just wants to play in water, no matter how cold or hot.
*She is wearing mostly 12 month clothes, as well as

It's so strange finally realizing that I have two separate kiddos. They may look the same with their blond hair and cute little faces, but they are so different! I love learning more about them as individuals every day.

Gentry Zoo

2010-07-07T14:15:00.001-05:00

To celebrate H-bugs first birthday, we went to the Gentry Zoo on Monday! She loved it. Both her and Malachi are big time animal lovers. I'm not sure where they get that from ;)

Haly kept her eye on the Emu's the entire drive. She did not like them. There's this look she gives when she's not sure of a situation, and the birds definitely got that look.
We named this guy Ted. Doesn't he look like a Ted? We aren't sure what he is, so we named him. The kids and I flipped out when he decided to stick his entire head in our car before we could roll up the window. He drooled on my skirt. The nerve!
This Camel also stuck his entire German Shepherd sized head in our window!

The best experience by far was the Zebras. Malachi just puckered up and laid a smooch on this guy. When we told him to do it again he informed us that it was "yucky" and then proceeded to scream "IT'S A WOLF"-or an Alpaca...with his head in Donovan's window with the most hilarious, ridiculous, "what me?" look on his face.

She loved the Zebras! Her favorite animal seemed to be the deer. Her squeal of delight was so beautiful. She wanted to touch them so badly, but we were mean parents and made her stay in the car...
After we drove through the Zoo, we were able to get out and head towards the petting area. The second we pulled out the stroller and had the kids strapped in, it poured. Luckily, it was very hot and humid on Monday, so the rain felt pretty nice. We were able to see Monkeys, a Kangaroo, baby goats and their momma, lots of chicken nuggets (Roosters and chickens-that's what Chi thinks they are called), and adorable baby Tortoises. My favorite part was to pet the baby Tigers they had! We had a great time and the kids loved being able to sit in our laps while we were trekking around the drive-thru part of the Zoo.

Happy Fathers Day!

2010-06-19T22:29:00.000-05:00

With Father's Day right around the corner (tomorrow) I have been thinking a lot about what it means to have a father in my life and for my children to have a father in their lives.
My husband. He is amazing. He is a really great dad. His laid back personality can fool anyone but me. In this house, he is known as many things aside from "just a laid back guy". He has many jobs and rolls to fill here. He is the tickle monster-lurking around every corner just waiting for a frown. He is the pushover who lets scared night stalkers slip into his side of the bed because "it's probably much more comfortable than his own bed" and doesn't count the number of chocolate milk "sippys" that are given once he is home. He is the epitome of Mr. Fun who suggests outings such as a couple hour trek to the zoo with an infant and a toddler because it he knows how much fun they will have. He is who everybody can't wait for to come home. He is a wonderful dad and spoils his kids rotten. The kids have only received a small glimpse of the relationship they will have in the future. I can see the amazing gifts of love and grace they will learn from him. He spoils them, loves them unconditionally and leads them toward a Christ centered life. The love of Christ flows from his heart to his children.
Daddy's boy since the beginning:

Always taking help

Adored

An example of the epitome of fun

She LOVES her da

She loves the kisses

He's always got your back baby girl!

First team meeting

For anyone who doesn't know my dad, he is an amazing man. He is the hardest working man I know. My entire life, he has been THE example of hard work. I don't think he realizes how much he has taught me in life. Some of the best memories I have of growing up are with him and my brother. I always recall going to Gunpowder Falls in the summer and swimming all day long. 22 cent cheeseburgers were sure to follow. It was either that or tacos from Taco Bell. I have fond memories of hours spent at parks, playing basketball, riding bikes and watching tons of movies. He spent time with my brother and I. Even when he had to work, he spent time with us. He patiently let us work along side him, even if it took longer to complete his tasks. He took responsibility for me when I made mistakes that could even cost him his job. He was always calm. He appreciated anything that was given to him, made for him or done for him. A funny memory I have is from when I was 8 years old. I had an easy bake oven and loved to make up my own recipes. My dad is so sweet and my brother and I tried to test that. We concocted a mixture of mayonnaise, mustard, relish, ketchup, dry noodles, ranch dressing and salt and pepper all combined with a brownie packet. My dad ate it. All. Like a champ. Years later we asked him if he really had liked it. Nope. But he ate it. He helped us with homework, cleaned up our scraped knees and hugged us even when he didn't want to be loved on. He is an amazing man. I am blessed to be able to call him Dad. Not all girls can say that. He is wonderful and my children are blessed to have him as a grandfather-or Pop Pop Jack :)

Donovan's dad is another example of hard work. He does anything to provide for his family. I think I can see where Donovan inherited this quality. He has a great example in his parents. We have the blessing of his family moving here next month. Our kids are going to be even more spoiled than they are with them living 1,000 miles away. Malachi and Halynd adore him and can't wait to call him up for ice cream dates :)

To all the amazing men I know in my life who are fathers-It takes so much hard work, dedication and love to be a father. Thank you to all the men who have been a positive example in my life of fatherly love. (My grandfathers (Grandpa and Charlie) and my friends who are fathers) Thank you for showing a minute picture of the love Christ has for us.

Happy Fathers' Day!!